Am I an A@@hole?

MrNightly

jakelm wrote:

Knightly...Your asking a bunch of guys to figure out why you are percieved to be an a$$hole by a woman???????

No offence, but I dont think you are going to get a good answer here budd. Read cosmo.

P.S. We are all a$$holes in a woman's eyes sometime. Sometimes for absolutly no reason.

There are women on this forum too... at least two. It's more of a venting place buddy, but whatever.

BIZILL

MrNightly wrote:

Ya ya, Doc, so I guess I should crawl back to her on my knee's and apologize for not planning something more romantic while giving her rose pedals and chocolates eh? Oh boy. Where does it put me if I just plain don't care right now?

Bad boy category? Plain stupid? asshat? whatever.

I just need a nap I think. I'm tired of this nonsense. Time for an SVS!

good deal. forget being worked up over it. don't neglect her too much, but don't let it eat you alive. you tried, and failed...but tried. she should recognize that and be happy and make you some pie.

MrNightly

BIZILL wrote:

maybe you should have donned your old officer uniform and role played awhile. perhaps you could have executed some 'police brutality', if you will. maybe she misses her man in a uniform.

I like your train of thought. Keep 'em coming!!!

I've been dreaming about getting on KCMO here in town, but I know the wife would never allow it again. But the question is, do I really care?! Of course... never mind. Silly me.

steveinaz

So you guys don't mess this up next year, here's some suggestions:

1. Women love surprises
2. Make reservations at a VERY NICE hotel (No, Super 8 doesn't qualify)
3. Plan the eveneing out, Dinner, Theater (NOT a movie)
4. Get back to the room and have some things "set-up" (Use your imagination, I'm not being payed for this)
5. Take her horseback riding or some-such
6. Get her a mothers ring, any woman with children loves mothers rings/or necklaces
7. If you buy her a piece of jewelry, it should have some signifigance; present it to her in a unique way (ie, hide it, put it on her pillow, etc)
8. Maybe take her to the place you first met, smooched, proposed, whatever
9. With most women, it's not the cost, it's the effort

Stay tuned for Stevie's Christmas ideas, coming in October....

BIZILL

MrNightly wrote:

Keep 'em coming!!!

no truer words could be spoken. anyway, i've got a heap of advice to give you, but will refrain as too many polkers here would object to that advice. but do trust, it works. remember, reverse psychology can be your friend.:D

steveinaz

MrNightly wrote:

Ya ya, Doc, so I guess I should crawl back to her on my knee's and apologize for not planning something more romantic while giving her rose pedals and chocolates eh? Oh boy. Where does it put me if I just plain don't care right now?

Bad boy category? Plain stupid? asshat? whatever.

hey, hey don't get short with me mister, I'm just trying to keep a brotha in the "big" bed, that's all...ROTFLMAO!!

jdhdiggs

BTW: My wife says that your an A$$hole for starting the thread and not for the evenings plans.... FWIW

audiobliss

jdhdiggs wrote:

BTW: My wife says that your an A$$hole for starting the thread and not for the evenings plans.... FWIW

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!


Sounds like you've got your work cut out for you for the next few weeks.

It sounds to me like she's the one who is over reacting. Maybe she's right and it was a lame night, I don't know, but even if that's the case she's not handling it properly.

petrym

steveinaz wrote:

So you guys don't mess this up next year, here's some suggestions:

Hire a (my) barbershop quartet to sing them some love songs on V-day -- all the women we sang to yesterday were absolutely overwhelmed and commented what a romantic gift it was.

steveinaz

petrym wrote:

Hire a (my) barbershop quartet to sing them some love songs on V-day -- all the women we sang to yesterday were absolutely overwhelmed and commented what a romantic gift it was.

Ed Zachry---see I bet your up to your chin in sex/food from your wife. Listen to this guy, he knows what he's doing.

Afterall men, isn't that what it's really all about? (sex/food)

BIZILL

petrym wrote:

Hire a (my) barbershop quartet to sing them some love songs on V-day -- all the women we sang to yesterday were absolutely overwhelmed and commented what a romantic gift it was.

cliche, but obviously tested and true.

but my vote is for dressing up in the 'ole uniform and sing to her yourself some "i want your sex" by george michael whilst dancing all sexy-like.

SLOCOOKN

steveinaz wrote:

So you guys don't mess this up next year, here's some suggestions:

1. Women love surprises
2. Make reservations at a VERY NICE hotel (No, Super 8 doesn't qualify)
3. Plan the evening out, Dinner, Theater (NOT a movie)
4. Get back to the room and have some things "set-up" (Use your imagination, I'm not being payed for this)
5. Take her horseback riding or some-such
6. Get her a mothers ring, any woman with children loves mothers rings/or necklaces
7. If you buy her a piece of jewelry, it should have some significance; present it to her in a unique way (ie, hide it, put it on her pillow, etc)
8. Maybe take her to the place you first met, smooched, proposed, whatever

Stay tuned for Stevie's Christmas ideas, coming in October....

PROBLEMS:
1. Wife would suspect I was cheating on her.
2. Wife would call bank account find the charge and consult her "friends" on what to do next.
3. She would think I was trying to keep her distracted. Why am I being nice.
4. Is this the same F**&% hotel I am sleeping with the ****!
5. I would be a pervert and watching other girls A$$
6 Finding receipt for jewelry...see #2 response.
7. Wife rolls over and finds jewelry under pillow, kicks my **** and moves out!
8. I pick the wrong place and she thinks I am thinking about another woman!

FACE IT WE WILL NEVER WIN. It is up to them. Enjoy them when you can and look at the BABE THREAD when you can't!

Steve

MrNightly

steveinaz wrote:

So you guys don't mess this up next year, here's some suggestions:

1. Women love surprises
2. Make reservations at a VERY NICE hotel (No, Super 8 doesn't qualify)
3. Plan the eveneing out, Dinner, Theater (NOT a movie)
4. Get back to the room and have some things "set-up" (Use your imagination, I'm not being payed for this)
5. Take her horseback riding or some-such
6. Get her a mothers ring, any woman with children loves mothers rings/or necklaces
7. If you buy her a piece of jewelry, it should have some signifigance; present it to her in a unique way (ie, hide it, put it on her pillow, etc)
8. Maybe take her to the place you first met, smooched, proposed, whatever
9. With most women, it's not the cost, it's the effort

Stay tuned for Stevie's Christmas ideas, coming in October....

First off, we had promised to not spend money on gifts this time around. I spent way too much on her over Xmas for jewelry and we just decided not to do that this time around. I tried the whole hotel room and "set-up" the first year of marriage as a surprise, and she literally turned up her nose at the whole affair, because I forgot to bring her toothbrush and pillow. I had flowers, gifts, candles, her favorite love songs burned onto a CD playing, and a $400 dollar room. It was the worst night of our marriage. And that's saying something

I had wanted to do the hotel thing again this year, but with us not spending money, it kinda took it outta the picture.

But you are right. I probably could have tried horseback riding in 3 degree weather Good call. Ha ha.

Anyways, I should probably take her out shopping tonight. Blah. She wants a new dinning room table, so if all else fails, spend money right?

Thanks for the tips. At least I'm young, and we have many many years ahead to enjoy together... HA HA HA HA.. eh, excuse me.

BIZILL

SLOCOOKN wrote:

PROBLEMS:
1. Wife would suspect I was cheating on her.
2. Wife would call bank account find the charge and consult her "friends" on what to do next.
3. She would think I was trying to keep her distracted. Why am I being nice.
4. Is this the same F**&% hotel I am sleeping with the ****!
5. I would be a pervert and watching other girls A$$
6 Finding receipt for jewelry...see #2 response.
7. Wife rolls over and finds jewelry under pillow, kicks my **** and moves out!
8. I pick the wrong place and she thinks I am thinking about another woman!

FACE IT WE WILL NEVER WIN. It is up to them. Enjoy them when you can and look at the BABE THREAD when you can't!

Steve

steve vs steve. i'm on steve's side!

shack

Valentines Day is an overblown CROCK! If after 30+ years together my wife and I don't have a clue that "I want you to be my valentine " or "A special day to say I love you" is nothing but marketing driven BS then we probably have greater issues...

I guess neither my wife and I are romantic people as such. My wife and I get each other a card and spend time together (went and ate dinner at the country club last night - burgers and fries). We don't need a SPECIAL day to prove the depth of our affection and committment.

bobman1235

SLOCOOKN wrote:

PROBLEMS:
1. Wife would suspect I was cheating on her.
2. Wife would call bank account find the charge and consult her "friends" on what to do next.
3. She would think I was trying to keep her distracted. Why am I being nice.
4. Is this the same F**&% hotel I am sleeping with the ****!
5. I would be a pervert and watching other girls A$$
6 Finding receipt for jewelry...see #2 response.
7. Wife rolls over and finds jewelry under pillow, kicks my **** and moves out!
8. I pick the wrong place and she thinks I am thinking about another woman!

FACE IT WE WILL NEVER WIN. It is up to them. Enjoy them when you can and look at the BABE THREAD when you can't!

Steve

Sounds like you got a real healthy relationship there Steve..... holy crap buddy. Trust issues much?

steveinaz

MrNightly wrote:

First off, we had promised to not spend money on...

LOL!!!!!!! My young, naive brotha. I could write a book on this fragment of a sentence alone....:D

FWIW, my wife and I didn't do anything out of the ordinary.

BIZILL

dude, it's perfection and success she's after. she neglects the thought behind it. maybe you're not good enough for her. no offense to you. but it would seem possibly no one is. i'm sure she's sweet, but holy moly, man!

SLOCOOKN

bobman1235 wrote:

Sounds like you got a real healthy relationship there Steve..... holy crap buddy. Trust issues much?

Just kiddin bro.... I was have fun with Steve. .

MrNightly

steveinaz wrote:

LOL!!!!!!! My young, naive brotha. I could write a book on this fragment of a sentence alone....:D

Ya ya ya, rub it in. I am beginning to see that I should have dropped some coin anyways. I took it at face value when they said, NO GIFTS!

I'll buy a copy of that book... when's the release date?

McLoki

Just an opinion - but there are more issues here than just a valentines day dinner. I have no doubt you are both pissed at this point, but you really need to figure out what the root cause of this is.

It all comes down to this:

Women marry men expecting that they will change. Men marry women expecting that they never will. Both end up dissapointed.

Michael

jakelm

MrNightly wrote:

There are women on this forum too... at least two. It's more of a venting place buddy, but whatever.

One time in the past 2 weeks just isn't cutting it for a guy ya know?!

I know and feel yah.. I'm just picking at you.

PolkThug

Monday is President's Day. Make it up to her then!

ninerbj

www.nomarriage.com

Skynut

I voted no.

My wife and I said no gifts.
I got her flowers and a card. Both last minuite and she knew it.
She had to wait for me to sign the card before we could exchange.
I let the kids sign the flower card so they wern't from me.

Basically I let her know that I am a last minuite guy and if she says no presents I believe her.

Yours just expected that with three weeks you could come up with something big but, if the Hotel failed before because of a toothbrush (they do provide pillows) then she is a hard one to please.

Next time she wants you to supprise her take her to a hotel where another girl is waiting for the both of you. That will suprise her.

(of course I kid)

PhantomOG

I find the idea of mandating to your spouse that you be surprised with something ironic. Doesn't that defeat the surpise?

Women want you to give them what they want, but if they have to tell you what they want, it doesn't satisfy their needs.

hoosier21

Perfect Example Of How Dumb We Men Are. Three weeks ago she was already thinking how "she" needed a romantic night, she did not want to tell you "how" to be romantic, she just wanted it to happen and love you for it.

Problem, you missed all the signals.

You took her to eat and then home, BFD in her mind.

And the bomb went off.


How do I know, experience.

How did you NOT KNOW she needed a romantic night "her version of romantic", you did not, you are an A$$HOLE.

Happens to me everytime, I miss the signals

Russ

PolkThug

Nightly,

Blue Man Group tickets are on sale now.

Also, New Theatre Restaurant is a winner, I've been a season ticket holder for a few years now.
http://www.newtheatre.com/bO/bo.html

jdhdiggs

ninerbj wrote:

www.nomarriage.com

Damn! :eek:

larryb52

sometimes no matter what you do you lose, my wife may get uptight about my spending on audio gear & music in general but I didn't buy her a card just took her to dinner & she was quite content...if you want to get out of the dog house buy roses, expensive but will make her day...