Never buy a House (with someone else!)

TroyD

Protect thyself.....

BDT

wingnut4772

I spoke to an attorney and he told me that I would lose way more money by forcing a sale in court than just losing money to her in a bad settlement.:(

I am now going to open up my Paypal account for donations....:eek: :eek:

WAH!

Ricardo

Wow...hard to believe that after someone signs off on a sale contract they can come back to sue you for forcing a sale.....wouldn't signing be "settling" for the sale amonunt???I'll never understand how laws work...

read-alot

BlueMDPicker wrote:

Here's what I'M talkin' 'bout for this thread. RIP Bob:

Don't bogart that joint my friend
Pass it over to me
Don't bogart that joint my friend
Pass it over to me

Roll another one
Just like the other one
You've been holding on to it
And I sure will like a hit


Yeah I grew up in the late 60's. Just pass that SOB over, things have really changed in this thread since I was last here. BTW I have "seen" joints that big and I was not in Jamaica.

shack

I think what he is saying is that the cost of going to court is much more expensive that negotiating a "less than optimal deal" (mainly HIS fees).

Negotiate a deal...with the help of the lawyers...and go from there. A court battle is not in HER best interest either. The cost of going to court to enforce a binding contract is cheaper/easier that forcing an unnegotiated sale. Once you have a contract in place, if she reneges then you are in the driver's seat and she would bear the cost of litigation.

Work it out...make sure it is legally binding...get it in writing!

BlueMDPicker

wingnut4772 wrote:

I will be sneaky about it. (

Golly geewillikers... I hope she doesn't happen upon this public forum. :eek:

TroyD

we got to be vewy vewy qwiet. We're hunting wabbits!

BDT

wingnut4772

TroyD wrote:

we got to be vewy vewy qwiet. We're hunting wabbits!

BDT

Heh heh heh heh heh

wingnut4772

shack wrote:

I think what he is saying is that the cost of going to court is much more expensive that negotiating a "less than optimal deal" (mainly HIS fees).

Negotiate a deal...with the help of the lawyers...and go from there. A court battle is not in HER best interest either. The cost of going to court to enforce a binding contract is cheaper/easier that forcing an unnegotiated sale. Once you have a contract in place, if she reneges then you are in the driver's seat and she would bear the cost of litigation.

Work it out...make sure it is legally binding...get it in writing!

Basically he said my only option was what's called a 'Partition Sale". Then the house is sold at auction by the courts for sometimes only 70% of the value of the home . When you consider that could be about 50k or so less than we owe...it would be cheaper just to give her my half and laugh at her when she goes to hell when she dies.:D HA.I just kidding. (but I made me laugh)I don't wish her any ill will...I just want O-U-T.

Dennis Gardner

With so much emotionally tied up in this relationship, if she is demanding to come out okay on this sale, you have got to appeal to the logical business side of her. The personal fealings have to be shelved by both parties to get the most out of the house and that may mean putting your HT back into full display, cinnamon bread in the oven and candles burning all over to appeal to buyers. Your house will bring what you want if shown properly. Use the tools you have both put into your house to get the most out of it.

This is beyond personal now, its strictly business, or both or you stand to lose. Just my opinion, good luck Darla.

brettw22

And above else, promise NOTHING other than a civil end to the relationship.

wingnut4772

$350.00 to send her a letter from the attorney :eek: Hopefully that will be all I need.

Skynut

In the letter you should ask for a $350.00 reply from her attorney.

wingnut4772

Skynut wrote:

In the letter you should ask for a $350.00 reply from her attorney.

I just hope that she does not get her own and this becomes a War of the Roses....but I think she has.

Skynut

That sucks, once the lawyers get to talking to each other any profit from the house goes to them.

amulford

Consider this, they figure they should be good for a third. EACH...

wingnut4772

I had a brainstorm that just might work. When she and I bought this house we did not have a contract that said should one of us desire to sell the house..it gets sold. Period. At a fair market value and if the other person doesn't like it they can buy you out.The end.

Well .....she still wants to work on this. I called my atty. to see if we can still draw up that contract . That way if she behaves great. If not, I am outta there with the contract to back me up and no stress. It just gets done without the drama. Win Win. She has agreed to this. I just think it's a terrific solution.....

schwarcw

I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

Attorneys don't like things to end nicely. They can't bill for a lot of hours that way. Each of your attorneys are probably meeting for lunch today, calculating the equity you BOTH have in the house, and dividing that number by their hourly rate. Sometimes these things don't get settled until the money is gone

cfrizz

That is just a wee bit paranoid Carl & a lot of hyperbole to boot. Not all lawyers are looking to clean you out & a good many truly want to help people.

Lawyers, have to earn a living just like everyone else, and they do come in very handy.

Unless you have a clue about what it takes to practice law, perhaps you shouldn't believe everything you see on tv about them.

PolkThug

schwarcw wrote:

I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

Attorneys don't like things to end nicely. They can't bill for a lot of hours that way. Each of your attorneys are probably meeting for lunch today, calculating the equity you BOTH have in the house, and dividing that number by their hourly rate. Sometimes these things don't get settled until the money is gone

+1

Good luck wingnut!

schwarcw

cfrizz wrote:

That is just a wee bit paranoid Carl & a lot of hyperbole to boot. Not all lawyers are looking to clean you out & a good many truly want to help people.

Lawyers, have to earn a living just like everyone else, and they do come in very handy.

Unless you have a clue about what it takes to practice law, perhaps you shouldn't believe everything you see on tv about them.

I know I'm exaggerating a little bit Cathy:) But, I know for a fact that these situations end much faster and cheaper when there is no money in play.

They come to an end even faster when there are no lawyers in play.

My ex and I pretty much settled our situation before we went looking for an attorney. We went to several who were horrified that we were there together and wanted to hire a "joint" attorney to write up the property settlement. Several flat out wouldn't take our case because "This is not how these things are done!" In the end it cost us about $2,000 in attorney fees. I have had more than a few friends who went through it and the property settlement was concluded only when the lawyers had most of the money.

wingnut4772

Ok....Good news. We are going to a lawyer recommended by our counselor to draw up an agreement between us..so we are going to work on it and continue to see a counselor together. We have actually had a nice couple of days and I think that we learned a lot from this incident so I am hopeful going forward. Now I have to replace those HT components I sold ....deviously clever, no?;)

dkg999

After every crisis you should reward yourself with something nice, like new HT/Audio equipment! That's my theory anyway!

wingnut4772

dkg999 wrote:

After every crisis you should reward yourself with something nice, like new HT/Audio equipment! That's my theory anyway!

Well then you should be proud of me because I did that and then some!:D New HT Thread

cfrizz

Darla, I would wait until things are really settled before replacing anything. Otherwise you could just be repeating this whole process all over again!

wingnut4772

I thought about that but I will just take it all with me in that case.

wingnut4772

Well ladies and gents, the time has finally arrived. There was no avoiding it any longer. It's just not working out. Believe it or not, I actually got spit on as well as got called several choice names during the final 'sell the house and break up' conversation which pretty much just validated my decision.

Now, the name of the game is $$$$$$$$$ as I will need to buy something myself so you may see an item or two pop up here in the FM. I figure I can just get it all again sometime so what the heck.

The funny thing is . even though this is stressful as hell, I am happy. I feel free. I just hope this house does not take forever to sell....

Ricardo

Darla,

Don't look back!
Don't let anything change your mind; it seems to me that this is the only way out, and that freedom feeling will pay off.

wingnut4772

There is NO coming back from getting spit in the face, that's for sure. It's ugly...she is beig tricky and spending money I am not approving of to fix up the house. I know she intends to take me to court for frivolous things like groceries etc. She is very vindictive....and yet I am happier now than I have been in 3 years.

Joelsbass

I can relate wingnut. My ex and I didn't buy a house together but we had a larger apartment than I would have otherwise had and I took out a loan in my name for her car, and I put her cell phone on my account, and all the bills were in my name plus several hundred in credit card debt... all this bit me in the **** when I found out the daughter I had been raising was actually someone else's... I'm finally getting to where I make more per month without overtime than I have to pay out but it's been a hard road... You have my sympathies sir! I hope things get better from here on out and I hope you learned your lesson! I know I did...