So, I'm in a rough situation right now...

2

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  • Tornado Red
    Tornado Red Posts: 939
    edited February 2014
    halo71 wrote: »
    Pics of her or it didn't happen! ;)



    But really....speaking from experience. If you continue communicating or seeing her things will only end badly. Sounds to me like she is playing the both of you. Playing her hand to see what her hubby's next move will be. Perhaps hoping he will make the decision she can't on her own...divorce. I've been down that road and it ended in divorce on both sides.

    ^This^

    The consensus is pretty strong, you know what you need to do, but you're fighting it. Look at the way she's treating her husband...that could easily be you in a couple years. Cut all ties, and move on.
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  • nooshinjohn
    nooshinjohn Posts: 25,465
    edited February 2014
    Oh the crap we post on the internet...

    Three words... find new friends.
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    “When once a Republic is corrupted, there is no possibility of remedying any of the growing evils but by removing the corruption and restoring its lost principles; every other correction is either useless or a new evil.”— Thomas Jefferson
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  • teekay0007
    teekay0007 Posts: 2,289
    edited February 2014
    Dubya-Dubya-Dee-Pee-Ess!?! (What Would Dr. Phil Say!?!)

    "I don't substitute anybody else's judgment for my own." - P.M.

    Then he'd say something like, "Now, pull up your boots, march into that barn and grab that horse by the horns!"

    He's usually on track about 50 percent of the time! So, take your pick of the above.
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  • cfrizz
    cfrizz Posts: 13,415
    edited February 2014
    For godsake this is NOT rocket science. She is MARRIED you have NO business being caught in the middle of their problems. Walk away and STAY away.

    That means NO chats on Facebook, no phone calls no contact whatsoever. Once you knew she was married you should have put distance between you and kept it there.

    She is looking for a new place to land & you are the sucker she has chosen. Cut ties now before you get in over your head. You've already got one foot on a banana peel. Keep it up and she is going to take you down with her.

    Find new friends.
    Marantz AV-7705 PrePro, Classé 5 channel 200wpc Amp, Oppo 103 BluRay, Rotel RCD-1072 CDP, Sony XBR-49X800E TV, Polk S60 Main Speakers, Polk ES30 Center Channel, Polk S15 Surround Speakers SVS SB12-NSD x2
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  • gudnoyez
    gudnoyez Posts: 8,132
    edited February 2014
    Sounds like trouble to me if she's playing both of you leave her alone even if she splits, hit a couple of bars and get lucky there chasing strays is a good way to get an a$$ whupin.
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  • Jimbo18
    Jimbo18 Posts: 2,337
    edited February 2014
    Can't say I know much about women, but at 61 yrs. of age, I have been around a while. IMHO, there's no easy solution to your problem. But I don't see how you can stay friends with either of them as long as they are together. Put yourself in your friend's shoes and ask yourself what you would do if your "homie" might have done something with your wife. He will always be wondering if you instigated it at all, especially if you admitted to having feelings for her.

    No way this can end well. Apologize and walk away before it gets ugly. Good luck.
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  • migueralliart
    migueralliart Posts: 10
    edited February 2014
    +1 on cutting ties and calling it a day
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  • NJPOLKER
    NJPOLKER Posts: 3,474
    edited February 2014
    Either you cut ties immediately from everyone involved or go all the way with her!!

    CUT ALL TIES

    By the way how does she look?
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  • pumpkinman
    pumpkinman Posts: 9,901
    edited February 2014
    tumblr_m91dtqa60c1qf9sqxo1_400.gif



    Kiss Kiss
    lmivdewpnb28.jpg


    Because I am The Pumpkinking


    A Kind Word Is An Easy Gift To Give
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  • gimpod
    gimpod Posts: 1,793
    edited February 2014
    cfrizz wrote: »
    For godsake this is NOT rocket science. She is MARRIED you have NO business being caught in the middle of their problems. Walk away and STAY away.

    That means NO chats on Facebook, no phone calls no contact whatsoever. Once you knew she was married you should have put distance between you and kept it there.

    She is looking for a new place to land & you are the sucker she has chosen. Cut ties now before you get in over your head. You've already got one foot on a banana peel. Keep it up and she is going to take you down with her.

    Find new friends.

    BINGO!

    cfrizz could not have said it any better. Listen these situations are nothing but trouble so get and stay away from these people, you want nothing to do with them period!.
    “The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.” ~ Mark Twain
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  • Moose68Bash
    Moose68Bash Posts: 3,843
    edited February 2014
    gimpod wrote: »
    bingo!

    cfrizz could not have said it any better. Listen these situations are nothing but trouble so get and stay away from these people, you want nothing to do with them period!.

    +++++++++++++++++

    double ditto
    Family Room, Innuos Statement streamer (Roon Core) with Morrow Audio USB cable to McIntosh MC 2700 pre with DC2 Digital Audio Module; AQ Sky XLRs to CAT 600.2 dualmono amp, Morrow Elite Speaker Cables to NOLA Baby Grand Reference Gold 3 speakers. Power source for all components: Silver Circle Audio Pure Power One with dedicated 20 amp circuit to main panel.

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  • oldrocker
    oldrocker Posts: 2,590
    edited February 2014
    I'm a going 3 "dittos" on the whole thing..
    Moose68Bash wrote: »
    +++++++++++++++++

    double ditto
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  • schwarcw
    schwarcw Posts: 7,341
    edited February 2014
    Mike Reeter wrote: »
    Hey man, if you don't want to take this any further, then I would quit spending nights on their couch and de-friend her on f-book and every other way.

    Single women can be enough to deal with, a married one can be a lot more trouble than they are worth. Just my 2 pennies.

    Mr. Reeter is a wise man. Take his advance as well as many others.

    I would make the mistake to hit it real good once or twice, then walk away. Don't do this!!
    Carl

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  • Sherardp
    Sherardp Posts: 8,038
    edited February 2014
    Cut the ties and back way off. Situations like this can turn ugly really fast if you stick around.
    Shoot the jumper.....................BALLIN.............!!!!!

    Home Theater Pics in the Showcase :cool:

    http://www.polkaudio.com/forums/showcase/view.php?userid=73580
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  • Green '01
    Green '01 Posts: 60
    edited February 2014
    See the movie, "Revenge" with Kevin Costner from 1990.
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  • Inspector 24
    Inspector 24 Posts: 1,308
    edited February 2014
    Sounds like it's time to get some new friends.
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  • tonyb
    tonyb Posts: 33,014
    edited February 2014
    Cathy nailed it, and everyone else concurs. You simply don't screw around with another mans wife no matter how innocent it appears. If you want to keep walking in an upright position, you best back away quick. Friends can be replaced, body parts....not so much.
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  • Willow
    Willow Posts: 11,060
    edited February 2014
    I also agree, move on, delete them as "friends". If for some reason down the road you bump in to her at a gas station she says she's single and you are too, then possibly it was meant to be... same goes for him, maybe you walk into each other lives again down the road and all is good, well then sir, you have a friend. You either have to retreat or go in with all guns blazin (knock her up and sign up for an episode on Springer). Best to retreat for all parties involved, mostly for you.
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  • heiney9
    heiney9 Posts: 25,217
    edited February 2014
    F1nut wrote: »
    So, she threw you under the bus and you're still talking to her? Stop talking to her, it'll only bring you more trouble.

    BINGO! What a ****, to throw you under the bus like that and still talk to you as if nothing happened.
    "Appreciation of audio is a completely subjective human experience. Measurements can provide a measure of insight, but are no substitute for human judgment. Why are we looking to reduce a subjective experience to objective criteria anyway? The subtleties of music and audio reproduction are for those who appreciate it. Differentiation by numbers is for those who do not".--Nelson Pass Pass Labs XA25 | EE Avant Pre | EE Mini Max Supreme DAC | MIT Shotgun S1 | Pangea AC14SE MKII | Legend L600 | BlueSound Node 3 - Tubes add soul!
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  • helipilotdoug
    helipilotdoug Posts: 1,229
    edited February 2014
    Ahhhh, Youth!! SeaBeeRob, with maturity, we hopefully learn to think with that head on top of our shoulders, not the other one!
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  • treitz3
    treitz3 Posts: 19,220
    edited February 2014
    Oldfatdogs wrote: »
    If she is married and coming on to you she will do it in her next relationship.
    I agree, Dan. How you get them is how you lose them.

    Tom
    ~ In search of accurate reproduction of music. Real sound is my reference and while perfection may not be attainable? If I chase it, I might just catch excellence. ~
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  • tonyb
    tonyb Posts: 33,014
    edited February 2014
    helipilotdoug wrote: »
    Ahhhh, Youth!! SeaBeeRob, with maturity, we hopefully learn to think with that head on top of our shoulders, not the other one!

    My thoughts exactly, only in Sicily people with these such problems have a tendency to disappear. Hence my words of caution.

    Youth of today have a hard time deciphering between reality....and a reality TV show. If you invite the drama, you must also suffer the consequences.
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  • exalted512
    exalted512 Posts: 10,735
    edited February 2014
    rick88 wrote: »
    go for it

    x2. yolo.
    Music is like candy, you have to get rid of the rappers to enjoy it
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  • exalted512
    exalted512 Posts: 10,735
    edited February 2014
    (kidding)
    Music is like candy, you have to get rid of the rappers to enjoy it
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  • mrbiron
    mrbiron Posts: 5,711
    edited February 2014
    3way yet?
    No? I'll check back when we hit page 3...
    Where’s the KABOOM?!?! There’s supposed to be an Earth shattering KABOOM!!!
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  • seabeerob213
    seabeerob213 Posts: 1,843
    edited February 2014
    that is exactly the answer i have been looking for, and what i know i need to do. im having trouble because most people i have known here have already transferred and it was seeming like i finally settled into a new group of friends, cutting ties with them means cutting them with many others as well, because we all end up at the same location by early in a friday or saturday night, not just those 2 and myself, so that is playing a big part in dragging my feet on this. im not usually the person to stop going somewhere to avid seeing someone, they can leave or avoid me, i dont care if i hate you or love you, we can, note i said can, not do, act like the adults were are and be tactful, and pleasant. this isnt so simple though.
    2 Channel(work in progress):DAC: Schiit modi 2 uberAmp:Parasound 1200 MK IISub:RBH 1010-SEP Speakers: Monitor 5A peerlesscurrently running some krk rokit 3g since the HK pre outs died and i need to start breaking everything down to move in a couple monthsHeadphones:Source: tidalDAC: schiit modius epre: schiit sysAmp: AQ dragonfly black/ schiit magni2 Cans: Velodyne V-True, Grado SR225i, sennheiser x drop gaming headsetPC:DAC: schiit modius e(over spdif)pre: schiit sysspeakers: prenous eris 5 xtSub: Earthquake Sound MiniMe-P63most of my comments are passing on of info, im a noob, im just trying to help how i can, if im wrong or out of place to comment, dont hesitate to let me know :)"WITH WILLING HEARTS AND SKILLFUL HANDS, THE DIFFICULT WE DO AT ONCE, THE IMPOSSIBLE TAKES A BIT LONGER, WITH COMPASSION FOR OTHERS. WE BUILD - WE FIGHT FOR PEACE WITH FREEDOM"Seabee Memorial, Arlington, VA
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  • boston1450
    boston1450 Posts: 7,676
    edited February 2014
    If this means leaving your pants behind & hauling a$$ in your undies'' id take the suggestions above & move on :smile:
    ..
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  • ZLTFUL
    ZLTFUL Posts: 5,656
    edited February 2014
    Assuming you are at NAS Sigonella, I am fairly certain there are far more places to hang out at than the one place that *they* all end up at.

    Fact is, you are setting yourself up for misery and not cutting all ties ASAP is going to lead to nothing but trouble. Not to mention how JAG feels about adultery. If you enjoy your career, run, don't walk away from this situation.
    "Some people find it easier to be conceited rather than correct."

    "Unwad those panties and have a good time man. We're all here to help each other, no matter how it might appear." DSkip
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  • seabeerob213
    seabeerob213 Posts: 1,843
    edited February 2014
    i am at sig, and living on the air base without a car(engine will be finished next week), base housing is about the only place to go, because the base bar is worse than that, and housing is usually where i end up. now the handful of friends i have, either spend their nights at clubs, bars, discotecas, and strip joints, most places which i dont like to go to, im not big into the clubbing scene, and tried to stay away when i ended up being the guy who has to break up fights, because im not a small guy, and i usually keep my intake well under control( not always, but i can count those occurrences on one hand), and dont wanna be involved with that kinda trouble. so i tried going out with just a couple friends, ended i went to sleep in the car when i got tired/bored, woke up to the car crashing into a ditch, theyre trying to get me for "letting it happen", so i hung out in housing with some friends, and refer to the OP for how that one turned out. didnt have these problems when i stay home or when i was spending time out in town with the yuliya(russian girl).so am looking for new friends and places to hang out, and not doing a whole lot of going out for now.
    2 Channel(work in progress):DAC: Schiit modi 2 uberAmp:Parasound 1200 MK IISub:RBH 1010-SEP Speakers: Monitor 5A peerlesscurrently running some krk rokit 3g since the HK pre outs died and i need to start breaking everything down to move in a couple monthsHeadphones:Source: tidalDAC: schiit modius epre: schiit sysAmp: AQ dragonfly black/ schiit magni2 Cans: Velodyne V-True, Grado SR225i, sennheiser x drop gaming headsetPC:DAC: schiit modius e(over spdif)pre: schiit sysspeakers: prenous eris 5 xtSub: Earthquake Sound MiniMe-P63most of my comments are passing on of info, im a noob, im just trying to help how i can, if im wrong or out of place to comment, dont hesitate to let me know :)"WITH WILLING HEARTS AND SKILLFUL HANDS, THE DIFFICULT WE DO AT ONCE, THE IMPOSSIBLE TAKES A BIT LONGER, WITH COMPASSION FOR OTHERS. WE BUILD - WE FIGHT FOR PEACE WITH FREEDOM"Seabee Memorial, Arlington, VA
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  • Oldfatdogs
    Oldfatdogs Posts: 1,874
    edited February 2014
    Rob,the guys here are trying to keep you out of the mess that can backlash quick in these situations.I know its hard to make new friends when away from home. But are these people really your friends with the rumors and gossip going on?We are as a group trying to help from experience,listen to us old guys that have been there done that.Just trying to have YOUR back.
    Cut All of them loose,enjoy your tunes and stay clear of the Sh%% .

    Just trying to help you out brother.

    Dan
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