WTF.......issues with the wife
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It could be worse Doggie, a lot worse!! When my ten year renunion invitation came I was looking after a young very sick wife at the time and she never did get better. I was exhasted at the time and feeling sorry for myself and for a fleeting minute, I thought of getting a nurse for a night and going. As it turns out I stayed home and spent a rare great evening with her as most of the time she was sleeping and couldn't talk due to the brain cancer she had.
I'm not bringing this up in an effort to get sympathy as this was many years ago now and its not my style anyway.
This thread just reminded me of a time and should illustrate to you how silly this whole thing is with your wife.
Life is too short and if you love her, let her know by your actions.
Tim"They're always talking about my drinking, but never mention my thirst" Oscar Wilde
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Well done Fellas! Especially you married ones.
Doggie you have your answer and it's unanimous!
Either attend with your wife or stay home and attend to & with her. Who knows, you might find that you can actually have more fun WITH your wife, rather than without her.
Why you would assume you would have more fun without her with a bunch of people you haven't seen in years & probably had little in common with when you did see them, doesn't reflect quite so well on you, now that you are supposed to be a grown adult.Marantz AV-7705 PrePro, Classé 5 channel 200wpc Amp, Oppo 103 BluRay, Rotel RCD-1072 CDP, Sony XBR-49X800E TV, Polk S60 Main Speakers, Polk ES30 Center Channel, Polk S15 Surround Speakers SVS SB12-NSD x2 -
Well done Fellas! Especially you married ones.
Doggie you have your answer and it's unanimous!
Either attend with your wife or stay home and attend to & with her. Who knows, you might find that you can actually have more fun WITH your wife, rather than without her.
Why you would assume you would have more fun without her with a bunch of people you haven't seen in years & probably had little in common with when you did see them, doesn't reflect quite so well on you, now that you are supposed to be a grown adult.
Hey! What about me? I did good too right?
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Darla, I wouldn't feel left out if I were you: people often expect men to be stupid and make stupid decisions, especially when it comes to relationships, but women to be smarter and make better decisions! If you didn't feel included in the praise Cathy offered, it's because you're expected to be smarter and a smart post from you (in particular) is no surprise to just about everyone here. As for the rest of us macho males, well ...wingnut4772 wrote: »Hey! What about me? I did good too right?Alea jacta est! -
Kex nailed it Darla! I KNEW you would pop in with what you said. Any woman married or not would.
What took me by surprise is all the guys who came up with the right answer & SAID IT, rather than to try and act all macho & say the wrong stupid thing even though they would know that they are wrong!
I am beyond impressed, and these guys are probably going have good strong happy marriages that are the exception rather than the rule!:cool::cool::cool:wingnut4772 wrote: »Hey! What about me? I did good too right?Marantz AV-7705 PrePro, Classé 5 channel 200wpc Amp, Oppo 103 BluRay, Rotel RCD-1072 CDP, Sony XBR-49X800E TV, Polk S60 Main Speakers, Polk ES30 Center Channel, Polk S15 Surround Speakers SVS SB12-NSD x2 -
doggie, I don't know you from Adam, but I'll tell you if one of my friends told me what I just read, I'd come home and tell my wife I don't expect to see them married much longer.
If you love your wife, you need to put your priorities in order. My wife is my best friend, and I wouldn't even consider going to my reunion without my wife (I wouldn't consider going to my reunion anyway but that's not the point).
It sounds like you don't have much in common if you don't think she's much fun. Maybe you should look into finding some things to do together that you both enjoy.
BTW, 21 yrs for us today.:)My equipment sig felt inadequate and deleted itself. -
BTW, 21 yrs for us today.:)
Congrats to both of you!
33 years here last month, and we didn't get there by....
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Congrats RIVRRAT on 21 years! My wife and I hit 12 years this coming Sunday. Took her to dinner and a Chris Botti concert a few days back to celebrate. I'd rather do that a hundred times over than go to a HS reunion.____________________________________________________________
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Buy her dress and take her to the damn thing! Introduce your wife to your former classmates who she had not met. Its gonna be fun unless, you were outcast in highschool. Or skip and take your wife out of city for a weekend and be together celebrate your reunion /getting older with love of your life. I am 100% BORN DEAF and No I am not kidding! Why am I here? My wife's hearing!
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Doggie...
Ah what the hell.. everyone has already said it. If you are married (I should state, if you are in a healthy marriage) you should be married to your best friend. If one spouse doesn't want to do things with the other, there are way bigger issues than the activity. I kinda have a little experience with this, even though I am young. If you don't support her and give up of yourself and your "Rights" she will probably go looking elsewhere... just like you would if she didn't respect and support you. It's human nature, however destructive and damaging it is.
It has nothing to do with being Macho, it has to do with putting her/him before yourself. (Then again, there are just bad eggs that even if you are doing everything right for them, they still stab you in the back... hmmm... sucks!)
Regardless, you have to answer the question for yourself... why would it be more fun without her? If you can answer that, maybe you can see a little clearer what your real heart feelings are. If you heart isn't into the marriage.. buddy... either realize it now or realize it later when she walks out of your life with half of everything you own...
just my little $.02 Honoured to be, an original SOPA founding member
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..with chili and jalapenos..
Take her to the reunion, dipstick.
Who knows, you may BOTH have a good time.
Compromise is the key to a great relationship. -
*singin'* NACHO! NACHO! MAN! I WANNA BE..A NACHO MAN!*/singin'*
mmmmmm......nachos!Expert Moron Extraordinaire
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Knucklehead wrote: »+1.....i could care less what 99.9% of my graduating class is doing....Id rather take my beautiful wife out to dinner and a movie and enjoy the rewards after!:D
Agreed. There's a reason you don't see these people anymore... you moved on with your life. Instead get a babysitter (you have plenty of time), and taker her out for a nice night out. I think you'll find the results more pleasant!!
"They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety."
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messiah, November 23rd, 2010 -
Why the hell would you ask us?
LOL!!!!!
I'm happily divorced for 20 years now. No more wives, no more kids, no more ****. "The good thing about science is that it's true whether or not you believe in it." Neil deGrasse Tyson. -
Get a babysitter (maybe one of her so called friends who are stirring the pot) and take the wife and have a great time. That is your best option. Peace.
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all i gotta say on this thread is , thank goodness for internet ****
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You don't get to pick who your parents are or who your kids are. You get to pick your mate and half of us get it wrong (divorce rate = 50%). By wanting to go to an event, where everybody is there to see how everybody else made out so far in life, and telling your wife you don't want her to go, you've basically obliterated her confidence because she's thinking the most important decision both of you made since leaving high school was to pick your spouse. You also added salt to the wound by saying you'll have more fun without her even though I'm sure you're trying to tell the truth when you say that.
If you want to fly solo now and then, she needs to be extremely confident in you and that usually means you've paid your dues several times over and then some. Payment determined by her.
Good luck -
I'll be the one dissenting vote, then. YMMV.
If she's freaking out because you want to go see people that she's never met, but people that you DID at one point have relationships with, (not necessarily romantic) and can't deal with you being gone for a weekend, there's underlying problems. I don't know what problems you've had or not in the past, but there's something else going on. Or she honestly may just not like you enjoying yourself.
I'm not married, but i have been dating a girl that i'm very much in love with for QUITE some time. The issue is, she's immersed herself in the relationship to the point that she really doesn't have any friends, doesn't do anything by herself for fun, and is completely dependent on me to entertain her. Doesn't sound all that bad, right? If i wanted to go to my HS reunion, she WOULD come along, and would have decided that within 10 seconds of me mentioning it.
Here's the problem: She doesn't like a single one of my hobbies. And is completely miserable whenever i drag her along when i'm racing, watching races, or working on my car, or tweaking my audio rigs. She doesn't understand any of it, doesn't want to understand any of it, and thinks it's ALL a waste of money, which as far as i can tell is one of the MOST important things to her. When she comes along and is miserable, i'm miserable too, and nobody has fun. Unfortunately, i haven't managed to find a way to get her to go do something else while i'm doing something that she hates.
If this sounds like you, then go alone. She'll be mad for a couple days, then get over it, and you'll have a fun weekend.
If this isn't your situation, then disregard my post, everyone else is right.
But this is just me.I don't read the newsssspaperssss because dey aaaallllllllll...... have ugly print.
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With the Internet and social networking such as facebook, who really need HS reunion? The people that you want to keep in touch with are the ones that you are probably currently in touch with, the rest are just memory of the past.
Re: your wife wanting to go.. I have no idea why...Main Gear
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Another option for this is Since her FAMILY thinks it's such a big deal that she attends with you, tell them that one of THEM need to step up & volunteer to babysit for the weekend. If none of them are willing to do that, then STFU & mind their damn business.
But you should definately take her. You could even bring your child with you.
When my brother attended his 20th reunion for Harvard, there were people there with all ages of children their with their parents. Activities were planned for families as well. It was a real good time.Marantz AV-7705 PrePro, Classé 5 channel 200wpc Amp, Oppo 103 BluRay, Rotel RCD-1072 CDP, Sony XBR-49X800E TV, Polk S60 Main Speakers, Polk ES30 Center Channel, Polk S15 Surround Speakers SVS SB12-NSD x2 -
OH yeah I have made up my mind and stood my ground. DOGHOUSE? Bring it on..............
Good for you, I hate wimpy mindless followers who cannot think for themselves... (I'm single btw...)
On the good side I heard someone in the relationship business (on the radio) say the following: Most wives treat their husbands as a project. Once he behaves as she has taught him he is no longer a project and her interest is lost. That is when the problems really begin in their relationship.
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I must be the luckiest guy on earth.....my wife would never treat me like that.
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Good for you, I hate wimpy mindless followers who cannot think for themselves... (I'm single btw...)
On the good side I heard someone in the relationship business (on the radio) say the following: Most wives treat their husbands as a project. Once he behaves as she has taught him he is no longer a project and her interest is lost. That is when the problems really begin in their relationship.
madmax
That's horrible. My wife and I got married when she was 20 and I was 21. We were told by all the people in our families that we were too young, that it would never work, that we were stupid and not mature enough to be married.
Most of these were in relationships that were failed, failing, or stuck in a horrible horrible suspension of boredom and general dislike for each other and in it for the money or the security and nothing about love. Or even liking one another.
Fast forward 7 years. My wife and I are happy. We didn't rush to have a child; we waited to get to know one another. And when it was apparent that we would continue to surprise each other for the duration of our relationship, we decided to add a third to our family. Fast forward 2 years to present.
We are all three happy. We recognize each other as people, not projects. And while we've had our hardships, we've realized that we are on the same team. And the only two things that we've really, really had disagreements about:
My obsession with gadgets and music.
Her obsession with clutter and books.
If you treat your other as a manipulative ****, she will be one. If you let her treat you like you are a broken toy, you'll be one.
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I am a strong believer of risk management. I am planning to go oversea for a month later this year. I talked to my wife and she agreed to let me go alone because who would taking care of the children if something bad would happen to both of us. (Of course, I will have more fun by traveling alone on this trip.)
Maybe your wife will see the benefits of risk management... -
TOOLFORLIFEFAN wrote: »This thread got me thinking about my wife, so i called her and asked her out on a date for tomorrow night.
I could hear the excitement in her voice, it has been way over due.
Thanks Doggie!!
Larry.
Tool... -
Most HS re-unions have a night for the grads only (Friday) and another for the couples (dinner / dance etc on Saturday). I went to one once that included a third day with the kids (picnic / BBQ etc).
35 years after graduation, I don't go to any more re-unions. Me and a couple of ther guys are the only ones with hair. -
That's horrible. My wife and I got married when she was 20 and I was 21. We were told by all the people in our families that we were too young, that it would never work, that we were stupid and not mature enough to be married.
Most of these were in relationships that were failed, failing, or stuck in a horrible horrible suspension of boredom and general dislike for each other and in it for the money or the security and nothing about love. Or even liking one another.
Fast forward 7 years. My wife and I are happy. We didn't rush to have a child; we waited to get to know one another. And when it was apparent that we would continue to surprise each other for the duration of our relationship, we decided to add a third to our family. Fast forward 2 years to present.
We are all three happy. We recognize each other as people, not projects. And while we've had our hardships, we've realized that we are on the same team. And the only two things that we've really, really had disagreements about:
My obsession with gadgets and music.
Her obsession with clutter and books.
If you treat your other as a manipulative ****, she will be one. If you let her treat you like you are a broken toy, you'll be one.
Welcome aboard dude... solid advice
Pull up a chair and enjoy the show... 'cause it's worth putting popcorn in the oven and a tall cold one in the other hand at times Honoured to be, an original SOPA founding member
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Political Correctness'.........defined
"A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a t-u-r-d by the clean end."
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Kex nailed it Darla! I KNEW you would pop in with what you said. Any woman married or not would.
What took me by surprise is all the guys who came up with the right answer & SAID IT, rather than to try and act all macho & say the wrong stupid thing even though they would know that they are wrong!
I am beyond impressed, and these guys are probably going have good strong happy marriages that are the exception rather than the rule!:cool::cool::cool:
Cathy,
You give guys way too little credit! While the gender differences are present, guys place as much of a value with their relationships as gals do too. Only "dicks" and "****" do not ... and that can be found on either side of the proverbial gender fence.
Lee -
Nachos and PIE!
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Dig it!
Keiko, you are going to get me all hot and bothered if you keep posting pics of yourself!
