Charmin?

13

Comments

  • jdhdiggs
    jdhdiggs Posts: 4,305
    edited May 2008
    Ok, well this thread seems like an appropriate thread to ask the question:

    You're in India and Shiva's revenge is a coming full force so you hall **** to the bathroom and lock yourself in the stall and all you see is a 4" diameter hole in the ground, a garden spicket and a measuring cup in the corner. What do you do? Seriously? I mean the fireball goose-**** are coming, how do you get out of there with your drawers unscathed and your dignity intact? WTH are you supposed to do?

    Yes, this sadly did happen to me...
    There is no genuine justice in any scheme of feeding and coddling the loafer whose only ponderable energies are devoted wholly to reproduction. Nine-tenths of the rights he bellows for are really privileges and he does nothing to deserve them. We not only acquired a vast population of morons, we have inculcated all morons, old or young, with the doctrine that the decent and industrious people of the country are bound to support them for all time.-Menkin
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  • bobman1235
    bobman1235 Posts: 10,822
    edited May 2008
    Never go to India would be my course of action :)
    If you will it, dude, it is no dream.
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  • NotaSuv
    NotaSuv Posts: 3,860
    edited May 2008
    hhhhhhmmmm am I the only one who uses the garden hose?


    ok what does the starship enterprise and toliet paper have in common?







    both fly around Uranus wiping out Klingons
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  • BottomFeeder
    BottomFeeder Posts: 1,684
    edited May 2008
    WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

    This thread just keeps going & going & going!

    & Getting better!

    Unbelievable.

    Now, isn't this a whole lot better than some of the rants & attacks that have gone on in the past?
    Well, maybe don't answer that...
    "Wish I didn't know now what I didn't know then." Bob Seger
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  • avguytx
    avguytx Posts: 1,628
    edited May 2008
    daboyz wrote: »
    Only here could we get 40+ posts on this topic........................

    Hey, it beats the "s**t posts" that CL35 comes up with.
    Richard? Who's your favorite Little Rascal? Alfalfa? Or is it........................Spanky?.................................Sinner.
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  • Jstas
    Jstas Posts: 14,842
    edited May 2008
    bobman1235 wrote: »
    Never go to India would be my course of action :)

    Ed Zachary!



    But if I gotta **** in a grimy hole and got the Hershey squirts like that, I'd take everything off from waist down, hang it up and let it fly! Then use that cup and that water spigot to clean up from the festivities.
    Expert Moron Extraordinaire

    You're just jealous 'cause the voices don't talk to you!
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  • jdhdiggs
    jdhdiggs Posts: 4,305
    edited May 2008
    Yes, bu how do you get the bunghole clean. BTW, the floor is wet and there's no clothes hooks...
    There is no genuine justice in any scheme of feeding and coddling the loafer whose only ponderable energies are devoted wholly to reproduction. Nine-tenths of the rights he bellows for are really privileges and he does nothing to deserve them. We not only acquired a vast population of morons, we have inculcated all morons, old or young, with the doctrine that the decent and industrious people of the country are bound to support them for all time.-Menkin
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  • pearsall001
    pearsall001 Posts: 5,092
    edited May 2008
    I use a Craftsman belt sander...hurts a little but does it ever keep your butt smooth & clean.
    "2 Channel & 11.2 HT "Two Channel:Magnepan LRSSchiit Audio Freya S - SS preConsonance Ref 50 - Tube preParasound HALO A21+ 2 channel ampBluesound NODE 2i streameriFi NEO iDSD DAC Oppo BDP-93KEF KC62 sub Home Theater:Full blown 11.2 set up.
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  • petrym
    petrym Posts: 1,912
    edited May 2008
    jdhdiggs wrote: »
    Yes, bu how do you get the bunghole clean. BTW, the floor is wet and there's no clothes hooks...
    Been stationed in Turkey with the some problem. :eek:
    Well campers, what did we do?
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  • Ricardo
    Ricardo Posts: 10,636
    edited May 2008
    Damn.....so that's what TP is. We use our hands as we learned from our ancestors.

    Now I understand why my daughter's friends always go home when they say they need to go to the restroom...and why my friends from work have not accepted my invitations anymore.

    You learn something every day.
    _________________________________________________
    ***\\\\\........................... My Audio Journey ............................./////***

    2008 & 2010 Football Pool WINNER
    SOPA
    Thank God for different opinions. Imagine the world if we all wanted the same woman
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  • BIZILL
    BIZILL Posts: 5,432
    edited May 2008
    man, we can get away with talking all this crap, yet threads consisting of tasteful babes gets shut down, as well as threads with political banter and religion.:rolleyes:

    POLK SDA-SRS 1.2TL -- ADCOM GFA-5802
    PANASONIC PT-AE4000U -- DIY WILSONART DW 135" 2.35:1 SCREEN
     ONKYO TX-SR805
    CENTER: CSI5
    MAINS: RTI8'S
    SURROUNDS: RTI8'S
    7.1 SURROUNDS: RTI6'S
    SUB: SVS PB12-PLUS/2 (12.3 series)
    XBOX 360    WiiPS3/blu-rayTOSHIBA HD-A35 hd dvd

    http://polkarmy.com/forums/index.php
    bobman1235 wrote:
    I have no facts to back that up, but I never let facts get in the way of my arguments.
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  • BottomFeeder
    BottomFeeder Posts: 1,684
    edited May 2008
    jdhdiggs wrote: »
    Ok, well this thread seems like an appropriate thread to ask the question:

    You're in India and Shiva's revenge is a coming full force so you hall **** to the bathroom and lock yourself in the stall and all you see is a 4" diameter hole in the ground, a garden spicket and a measuring cup in the corner. What do you do? Seriously? I mean the fireball goose-**** are coming, how do you get out of there with your drawers unscathed and your dignity intact? WTH are you supposed to do?

    Yes, this sadly did happen to me...

    Ok, I guess I'll take a shot, er, squirt?
    You don't get out of there w/your drawers unscathed. Or maybe you do, but you gotta clean house w/something, so maybe use a sock that you leave behind w/what your behind has left behind?
    "Wish I didn't know now what I didn't know then." Bob Seger
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  • Face
    Face Posts: 14,340
    edited May 2008
    Use your draws and go commando. If it happens again before you can get back to your room, start using socks.
    "He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And when you gaze long into an abyss the abyss also gazes into you." Friedrich Nietzsche
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  • Jstas
    Jstas Posts: 14,842
    edited May 2008
    jdhdiggs wrote: »
    Yes, bu how do you get the bunghole clean. BTW, the floor is wet and there's no clothes hooks...

    Well, see, that's what we call "up ****'s creek" and quite literally I might add.
    Expert Moron Extraordinaire

    You're just jealous 'cause the voices don't talk to you!
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  • BIZILL
    BIZILL Posts: 5,432
    edited May 2008
    Face wrote: »
    Use your draws and go commando. If it happens again before you can get back to your room, start using socks.

    maybe i'll start wearing underbriefs for that purpose alone. anyway, just came back from doing my duty, or shall i say, "doody", and realized we got that cheap stuff at work that not only slips from your arse, but also slips from your fingers. no tear through. just slippage.:mad: slippery paper. who's crappy idea was that?

    POLK SDA-SRS 1.2TL -- ADCOM GFA-5802
    PANASONIC PT-AE4000U -- DIY WILSONART DW 135" 2.35:1 SCREEN
     ONKYO TX-SR805
    CENTER: CSI5
    MAINS: RTI8'S
    SURROUNDS: RTI8'S
    7.1 SURROUNDS: RTI6'S
    SUB: SVS PB12-PLUS/2 (12.3 series)
    XBOX 360    WiiPS3/blu-rayTOSHIBA HD-A35 hd dvd

    http://polkarmy.com/forums/index.php
    bobman1235 wrote:
    I have no facts to back that up, but I never let facts get in the way of my arguments.
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  • BottomFeeder
    BottomFeeder Posts: 1,684
    edited May 2008
    Maybe we could put together an official "Polk Audio TP Test Team?" They could "log in" each day for a week, just after having made a doo doo, with the results and impressions of the paper they've just tested.

    Can you see it w/me? We'd need a logo, t-shirts, socks for jdhdiggs, hats, a web site...w/the comments here, we could make some coin to fund our audio habit!
    "Wish I didn't know now what I didn't know then." Bob Seger
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  • dholmes
    dholmes Posts: 1,136
    edited May 2008
    When I was a poor child we used corn cobs & newspaper!!! my a$$ was tough
    My HT set-up Panasonic front proj, 120 in ws screen, ATI amp,Integra 9.8 pre-pro, 2 Polk rti150, cp 1000, 4 fx 1000, Pioneer blu-ray 2 SVS sub pb 12-ultra 2, & Paragon popcorn popper. ps 3 Coaster leather HT recliners.
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  • petrym
    petrym Posts: 1,912
    edited May 2008
    :eek: make it stop already... :eek:

    I've read way too many of you people's habits, of course, I can't stop coming back to this thread! LOL! :o
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  • BIZILL
    BIZILL Posts: 5,432
    edited May 2008
    some might label that a "fetish". SCAT.

    POLK SDA-SRS 1.2TL -- ADCOM GFA-5802
    PANASONIC PT-AE4000U -- DIY WILSONART DW 135" 2.35:1 SCREEN
     ONKYO TX-SR805
    CENTER: CSI5
    MAINS: RTI8'S
    SURROUNDS: RTI8'S
    7.1 SURROUNDS: RTI6'S
    SUB: SVS PB12-PLUS/2 (12.3 series)
    XBOX 360    WiiPS3/blu-rayTOSHIBA HD-A35 hd dvd

    http://polkarmy.com/forums/index.php
    bobman1235 wrote:
    I have no facts to back that up, but I never let facts get in the way of my arguments.
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  • DollarDave
    DollarDave Posts: 2,575
    edited May 2008
    dholmes wrote: »
    When I was a poor child we used corn cobs & newspaper!!! my a$$ was tough

    Isn't this still the case in most of Kentucky and the better part of Canada?

    Just Kidding!!
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  • ND13
    ND13 Posts: 7,601
    edited May 2008
    Give me Cottonelle, baby.
    "SOME PEOPLE CALL ME MAURICE,
    CAUSE I SPEAK OF THE POMPITIOUS OF LOVE"
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  • petrym
    petrym Posts: 1,912
    edited May 2008
    BIZILL wrote: »
    some might label that a "fetish". SCAT.
    more like morbid curiosity... :p
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  • 4406bbl
    4406bbl Posts: 194
    edited May 2008
    cottonelle with aloe rules.
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  • hearingimpared
    hearingimpared Posts: 21,136
    edited May 2008
    jdhdiggs wrote: »
    Ok, well this thread seems like an appropriate thread to ask the question:

    You're in India and Shiva's revenge is a coming full force so you hall **** to the bathroom and lock yourself in the stall and all you see is a 4" diameter hole in the ground, a garden spicket and a measuring cup in the corner. What do you do? Seriously? I mean the fireball goose-**** are coming, how do you get out of there with your drawers unscathed and your dignity intact? WTH are you supposed to do?

    Yes, this sadly did happen to me...

    You don't need to go to India for this to happen. I was driving down the Atlantic City Expressway when all of a sudden the rumbles and a blowout was immanent. I cut to shoulder and got to the first tree and blowout occured, I used a sock to clean up and it did a damned good job; drove another two hours with no symptoms of the dreaded ichy **** or as I prefer to say around the kids, I A!:D
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  • skipf
    skipf Posts: 694
    edited May 2008
    hearingimpared wrote: »
    You don't need to go to India for this to happen. I was driving down the Atlantic City Expressway when all of a sudden the rumbles and a blowout was immanent. I cut to shoulder and got to the first tree and blowout occured, I used a sock to clean up and it did a damned good job; drove another two hours with no symptoms of the dreaded ichy **** or as I prefer to say around the kids, I A!:D

    Don't waste another perfectly good sock, for mother nature provides for our needs in a wonderful manner. Trees are full of quite effective wipes. My personal preferences run to Magnolia and Rhododendron. Thick enough to avoid tearing like those whimpy Mapels are prone to do, Have the proper elongated shape for a full stroke, and just the right amount of roughness on the back sides to do an effective job of collection without smearing. One word of warning, stay away from vines with leaves in a cluster of three.
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  • treitz3
    treitz3 Posts: 19,197
    edited May 2008
    As a kid I found out Skip's advice is spot on. Talk about I A. :eek:
    ~ In search of accurate reproduction of music. Real sound is my reference and while perfection may not be attainable? If I chase it, I might just catch excellence. ~
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  • Jstas
    Jstas Posts: 14,842
    edited May 2008
    My dad used to do a ton of road work and drove a bunch. So he used to keep a couple rolls of poo paper in the car with him for just such an occasion.
    Expert Moron Extraordinaire

    You're just jealous 'cause the voices don't talk to you!
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  • RuSsMaN
    RuSsMaN Posts: 17,986
    edited May 2008
    Mark sh!ts on cell sites. There I said it.
    Check your lips at the door woman. Shake your hips like battleships. Yeah, all the white girls trip when I sing at Sunday service.
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  • hearingimpared
    hearingimpared Posts: 21,136
    edited May 2008
    skipf wrote: »
    Don't waste another perfectly good sock, for mother nature provides for our needs in a wonderful manner. Trees are full of quite effective wipes. My personal preferences run to Magnolia and Rhododendron. Thick enough to avoid tearing like those whimpy Mapels are prone to do, Have the proper elongated shape for a full stroke, and just the right amount of roughness on the back sides to do an effective job of collection without smearing. One word of warning, stay away from vines with leaves in a cluster of three.

    When I was a boy scout, (yes I was), I saw a guy use mother nature to wipe his behind. The poor bastage ended up with poison ivy on the jewels, the bungus, and his entire rear-end.
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  • mrbigbluelight
    mrbigbluelight Posts: 9,840
    edited May 2008
    hearingimpared wrote: »
    When I was a boy scout, (yes I was), I saw a guy use mother nature to wipe his behind. The poor bastage ended up with poison ivy on the jewels, the bungus, and his entire rear-end.

    ..... at least that's what you guys told his mom. :)
    Sal Palooza
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