No sex since 1955
F1nut
Posts: 50,471
A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation..
"Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man.. Is something bothering you?"
"Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature.."
The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action."
"Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."
The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself."
The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner. Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?"
"1955, ma'am."
"Well, there you are. No wonder you're so serious. You really need to chill out! I mean, no sex since 1955! She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times. Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955."
The Sergeant Major said in his serious voice, after glancing at his watch, "I hope not; it's only 2130 now."
"Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man.. Is something bothering you?"
"Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature.."
The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action."
"Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."
The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself."
The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner. Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?"
"1955, ma'am."
"Well, there you are. No wonder you're so serious. You really need to chill out! I mean, no sex since 1955! She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times. Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955."
The Sergeant Major said in his serious voice, after glancing at his watch, "I hope not; it's only 2130 now."
Political Correctness'.........defined
"A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a t-u-r-d by the clean end."
President of Club Polk
"A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a t-u-r-d by the clean end."
President of Club Polk
Post edited by F1nut on
Comments
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ahhahahaahahhahahhahahhahaahahhahahahah
that was good, never heard that one before! -
Lol!!!!:D:D:D
Semper FI!:DThe Gear... Carver "Statement" Mono-blocks, Mcintosh C2300 Arcam AVR20, Oppo UDP-203 4K Blu-ray player, Sony XBR70x850B 4k, Polk Audio Legend L800 with height modules, L400 Center Channel Polk audio AB800 "in-wall" surrounds. Marantz MM7025 stereo amp. Simaudio Moon 680d DSD
“When once a Republic is corrupted, there is no possibility of remedying any of the growing evils but by removing the corruption and restoring its lost principles; every other correction is either useless or a new evil.”— Thomas Jefferson -
Nice, I like this one too. Hope you don't mind a little copy and paste, I have some Marines in the office that will love this one. Semper FiShoot the jumper.....................BALLIN.............!!!!!
Home Theater Pics in the Showcase :cool:
http://www.polkaudio.com/forums/showcase/view.php?userid=73580 -
Very funny!
Just don't admit that when you retold it, you pretended it was a true story about yourself and a recent encounter!Nice, I like this one too. Hope you don't mind a little copy and paste, I have some Marines in the office that will love this one. Semper FiAlea jacta est! -
That's great!"He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And when you gaze long into an abyss the abyss also gazes into you." Friedrich Nietzsche
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Wow, only 5 out of 159 of you have a sense of humor....sad.Political Correctness'.........defined
"A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a t-u-r-d by the clean end."
President of Club Polk -
Maybe the rest don't understand military time?
"He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And when you gaze long into an abyss the abyss also gazes into you." Friedrich Nietzsche -
These days.....you have a point.Political Correctness'.........defined
"A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a t-u-r-d by the clean end."
President of Club Polk -
Good fun!
I liked your joke about drinking with an Arizona girl even better!;):DCarl -
Love it......Pio Elete Pro 520
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that was pretty funnyMain 2ch -
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I liked your joke about drinking with an Arizona girl even better!;):D
Carl, I can't take credit for either one, but yeah, I got ya. Political Correctness'.........defined
"A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a t-u-r-d by the clean end."
President of Club Polk -
Wow, only 5 out of 159 of you have a sense of humor....sad.
or maybe we heard that one in say 1991 and didnt warrant a response..... -
Carl, I can't take credit for either one, but yeah, I got ya.
mustve missed the arizona girl joke?
-CodyMusic is like candy, you have to get rid of the rappers to enjoy it -
LMAO! That's a good one!:DThe nirvana inducer-
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Awesome very funny.
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Wow, only 5 out of 159 of you have a sense of humor....sad.
All right, Jesse, you've shamed me into replying--I was one of the 159 and I laughed out loud. Best joke I've heard in a while!
JayJay
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very good! and a big "Ooorah" to those hard chargin' leatherneck devil dogs...Thanks!
Searay40dad
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good one! panasonic th-50pz85u
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back at cha searay!
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That was pretty funny.Receiver
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LOL,, that was pretty good. Always ready eh?:)JC approves....he told me so. (F-1 nut)
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Just saw this! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, Kind of reminds of our wiley friend GG!!!:D
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The thread has been deleted, I think (it wasn't very appropriate for C.P., and the O.P. removed it anyway) but you can find it outside of C.P.exalted512 wrote: »mustve missed the arizona girl joke?
-Cody
I'll send you a link by P.M., since it was your birthday this week.Alea jacta est! -
The thread has been deleted, I think (it wasn't very appropriate for C.P., and the O.P. removed it anyway) but you can find it outside of C.P.
I'll send you a link by P.M., since it was your birthday this week.
LMAO Kex, your link showed up in my email notification of your reply to this thread!!! MUuuuuhaaaaa!!!:D
BTW the Arizona Girl joke, WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! -
Glad you got a laugh out of it, even if I didn't!hearingimpared wrote: »LMAO Kex, your link showed up in my email notification of your reply to this thread!!! ...Alea jacta est!
