How do I tell a friend he screwed up

HB27
HB27 Posts: 1,518
edited February 2010 in Electronics
OK, here's the deal.
A buddy of mine used my preamp on his old Sansui receiver.
He pulled the jumpers off his Sansui to hook up the pre into his amps for a better phono section playback.
He hooked it up wrong and damaged both components. Now he's cussing the preamp and blaming me for ruining his receiver.
He called me 3 times on how to hook it into his receiver. I explained very simply how it's done and the principal behind splitting his amp and preamp sections. I guess he just didn't grasp the concept.
He's pretty knowledgeable about audio but in hindsight it's pretty apparent this was new to him.
Any suggestions to help explain to him it's not the preamp or receivers fault?
Sometimes (ok, a lot of the time) I'm not very diplomatic.
Advice welcome.
Thanks,
Harry
Post edited by HB27 on
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Comments

  • george daniel
    george daniel Posts: 12,096
    edited February 2010
    just be honest with him,, in person.
    JC approves....he told me so. (F-1 nut)
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  • cnh
    cnh Posts: 13,284
    edited February 2010
    **** happens....good friends should be able to get over it and share a beer!

    If he's a close friend--it should pass.

    cnh
    Currently orbiting Bowie's Blackstar.!

    Polk Lsi-7s, Def Tech 8" sub, HK 3490, HK HD 990 (CDP/DAC), AKG Q701s
    [sig. changed on a monthly basis as I rotate in and out of my stash]
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  • HB27
    HB27 Posts: 1,518
    edited February 2010
    Thanks George.
    It's tough right now as he's still in the "Pis.ed off Stage" and won't talk. I'm hoping a cool down period will help. He's a good guy and I haven't seen this side of him before. I don't like friends upset with me.
    Harry
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  • mantis
    mantis Posts: 17,233
    edited February 2010
    Be honest , over a beer sounds like a plan.
    Dan
    My personal quest is to save to world of bad audio, one thread at a time.
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  • wutadumsn23
    wutadumsn23 Posts: 3,702
    edited February 2010
    LOL Sal. Wait until he cools off and have a chat with him, if he is a good friend he will see the most likely cause of this incident was operator error/inexperience and hopefully be an adult about it.

    -Jeff
    HT Rig
    Receiver- Onkyo TX-SR806
    Mains- Polk Audio Monitor 70
    Center- Polk Audio CS2
    Surrounds- Polk Audio TSi 500's :D
    Sub- Polk Audio PSW125
    Retired- Polk Audio Monitor 40's
    T.V.- 60" Sony SXRD KDS-60A2000 LCoS
    Blu-Ray- 80 GB PS3


    2 CH rig (in progress)
    Polk Audio Monitor 10A's :cool:

    It's not that I'm insensitive, I just don't care.. :D
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  • TNRabbit
    TNRabbit Posts: 2,168
    edited February 2010
    Lasareath wrote: »
    I would send a text message, it's easier!


    :D:D:D

    I like you~
    TNRabbit
    NO Polk Audio Equipment :eek:
    Sunfire TG-IV
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  • HB27
    HB27 Posts: 1,518
    edited February 2010
    I emailed him back and told him to bring them over today after I get out of the VA hospital (normal appointments) and I'd have a look at it. I'm sure I can fix his Sansui without any major issue. I've seen this done before.
    He's pretty upset and most likely it's gonna take a lot of cooling off.
    He won't answer emails. BTW, I don't text. I don't understand the benefits of it. Seems like a two way pager to me.
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  • wutadumsn23
    wutadumsn23 Posts: 3,702
    edited February 2010
    I would stay away from the texts as wekk, they can very easily be taken the wrong way since you can't "express" your intentions correctly.

    -Jeff
    HT Rig
    Receiver- Onkyo TX-SR806
    Mains- Polk Audio Monitor 70
    Center- Polk Audio CS2
    Surrounds- Polk Audio TSi 500's :D
    Sub- Polk Audio PSW125
    Retired- Polk Audio Monitor 40's
    T.V.- 60" Sony SXRD KDS-60A2000 LCoS
    Blu-Ray- 80 GB PS3


    2 CH rig (in progress)
    Polk Audio Monitor 10A's :cool:

    It's not that I'm insensitive, I just don't care.. :D
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  • nooshinjohn
    nooshinjohn Posts: 25,556
    edited February 2010
    Lasareath wrote: »
    I would send a text message, it's easier!


    Sexting could also work:eek: ;)
    The Gear... Carver "Statement" Mono-blocks, Mcintosh C2300 Arcam AVR20, Oppo UDP-203 4K Blu-ray player, Sony XBR70x850B 4k, Polk Audio Legend L800 with height modules, L400 Center Channel Polk audio AB800 "in-wall" surrounds. Marantz MM7025 stereo amp. Simaudio Moon 680d DSD

    “When once a Republic is corrupted, there is no possibility of remedying any of the growing evils but by removing the corruption and restoring its lost principles; every other correction is either useless or a new evil.”— Thomas Jefferson
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  • concealer404
    concealer404 Posts: 7,440
    edited February 2010
    Just wait for him to cool down and be ready to talk. Until he's ready to talk rationally, there's no sense in bugging him about it.

    OR:

    Send me after him, i can take care of your light work for you. ;)
    I don't read the newsssspaperssss because dey aaaallllllllll...... have ugly print.

    Living Room: B&K Reference 5 S2 / Parasound HCA-1000A / Emotiva XDA-2 / Pioneer BDP-51FD / Paradigm 11se MKiii

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    Office: Schiit Magni 2 Uber / Schiit Modi 2 Uber / Dynaco SCA-80Q / Paradigm Legend V.3

    HT: Denon AVR-X3400H / Sony UBP-X700 / RT16 / CS350LS / RT7 / SVS PB1000
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  • wutadumsn23
    wutadumsn23 Posts: 3,702
    edited February 2010
    nooshinjohn wrote: »
    Sexting could also work:eek: ;)

    Yikes, lol.

    -Jeff
    HT Rig
    Receiver- Onkyo TX-SR806
    Mains- Polk Audio Monitor 70
    Center- Polk Audio CS2
    Surrounds- Polk Audio TSi 500's :D
    Sub- Polk Audio PSW125
    Retired- Polk Audio Monitor 40's
    T.V.- 60" Sony SXRD KDS-60A2000 LCoS
    Blu-Ray- 80 GB PS3


    2 CH rig (in progress)
    Polk Audio Monitor 10A's :cool:

    It's not that I'm insensitive, I just don't care.. :D
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  • Face
    Face Posts: 14,340
    edited February 2010
    He sounds like a blockhead.
    "He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And when you gaze long into an abyss the abyss also gazes into you." Friedrich Nietzsche
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  • billbillw
    billbillw Posts: 7,066
    edited February 2010
    I don't see how any arrangement of RCA cables could damage both components unless one was already on its way out (sending DC through the outputs). Perhaps you could explain how he hooked things up and what the damage is.
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  • Dawgfish
    Dawgfish Posts: 2,554
    edited February 2010
    I'd kick him in the jimmy and be done with it. Joke, the sit down, have a beer, and talk about it approach is always a good one. Now if I could only get my fiance to do that more often, or maybe the laydown, have sex, not talk about it, and forget it never happened I'd have it made!
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  • tcrossma
    tcrossma Posts: 1,301
    edited February 2010
    HB27 wrote: »
    BTW, I don't text. I don't understand the benefits of it. Seems like a two way pager to me.

    And why use e-mail? Or a telephone? Might as well just do away with it all and go back to good ol'fashioned face-to-face. Texting is just another way to communicate, in addition to all the others. It's basic e-mail without having to be in front of a computer. But being "against" it just for the sake of being against it is kind of stubborn.

    As to your problem, he borrowed your pre, broke it, and is now mad at you? Sounds like you both lost something in this exchange (while it was in *his* hands), so I don't see why he should be mad at you. Just talk to him, tell him what you think might have happened, remind him that you're out a preamp because of this too, and see if he can get over it. Once he does, have him buy you a new preamp considering he broke yours.
    Speakers: Polk LSi15
    Pre: Adcom GFP-750 with HT Bypass
    Amp: Pass Labs X-150
    CD/DVD Player: Classe CDP-10
    Interconnects: MIT Shortgun S3 Pro XLR
    Speaker cables: MIT MH-750 bi-wire
    TT:Micro Seiki DD-35
    Cartridge:Denon DL-160
    Phono Pre:PS Audio GCPH
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  • mhmacw
    mhmacw Posts: 832
    edited February 2010
    ok...heres what you do! go get one of those rubber gripped 28"long demarini softball bats see--no wait let me start over. splain to him that its just a f'n radio and they made lots of them. stop and get a 12 pack on the way home from the hifi store.
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  • Huck344
    Huck344 Posts: 453
    edited February 2010
    If it was me, I would just ignore it. You did him a solid by loaning him your gear a explaining to him how to hook it up. He did it wrong and now he's pissed at you, but he's probably more pissed at himself and just can't admit it. You've reached out to him and he's rejected any explanation. Right now, there's nothing you can do. If he's a good friend, he'll come around sooner or later. But, it's not like you slept with his wife or daughter.
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  • HB27
    HB27 Posts: 1,518
    edited February 2010
    ALL Good??? advice.
    I just don't want to lose a friend over a couple of pieced of old gear. I'm sure he'll cool down and realize what really happened and we'll eventually get a laugh about it.
    He's a good guy. I just worry too much maybe.
    Harry
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  • Demiurge
    Demiurge Posts: 10,874
    edited February 2010
    Stab him and bury him under his floor boards. That'll teach him.
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  • hearingimpared
    hearingimpared Posts: 21,136
    edited February 2010
    Demiurge wrote: »
    Stab him and bury him under his floor boards. That'll teach him.

    Be careful with that one, ya know the Tell Tale Heart and all!:D
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  • Jetmaker737
    Jetmaker737 Posts: 1,069
    edited February 2010
    The guy sounds like an ****.
    SystemLuxman L-590AXII Integrated Amplifier|KEF Reference 1 Loudspeakers|PS Audio Directream Jr|Sansui TU-9900 Tuner|TEAC A-6100 RtR|Nakamichi RX-202 Cassette
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  • rcrook317
    rcrook317 Posts: 280
    edited February 2010
    Jetmaker737 wrote: »
    The guy sounds like an ****.

    really!accidents happen.Borrowed my budddys kenwood amp.
    Somehow a power surge blew my driver and tweeter,i didnt blame him,i went and got it fixed.

    **** happens......deal w it
    fronts=rti12s(cherry)
    center=csi3(cherry)
    sub=psw125(cherry)
    emotiva xpa-2
    harmon kardon 354
    sony cdp
    ipod 8gb
    audioquest diamondback 1m
    "Maesto" straightwire cables
    pangea ac-9
    playstation3/120gb=blu-ray/media server
    monitor=lg 55inch lcd(1080p)
    TT Set-up=Pro-Ject RM 1.3
    Kenwood Phono
    bren1 Clamp
    Herbies Slipmat

    "It doesnt mean that much to me,to mean that much to you"
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  • Face
    Face Posts: 14,340
    edited February 2010
    Jetmaker737 wrote: »
    The guy sounds like an ****.

    Tell us how you really feel? :D
    "He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And when you gaze long into an abyss the abyss also gazes into you." Friedrich Nietzsche
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  • george daniel
    george daniel Posts: 12,096
    edited February 2010
    If he damaged your pre in the process,,he's most likely to busy getting it fixed,,I know I would.
    JC approves....he told me so. (F-1 nut)
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  • dagame27
    dagame27 Posts: 590
    edited February 2010
    Harry, if he is any kind of friend, this will all blow over. Just sit down with him over a couple glasses of whiskey and explain it to him. I can't count how many times I have swore under my breath when something goes wrong. Too bad it is typically my own damn fault. Aside from this, how have you been doing? You still have the SDA 2A's?
    ChrisIntegrated Amp: Cary SI-300D Processor: Marantz SR7012 Streaming: Bluesound Node 2I 4K Bluray: Panasonic UB820Mains: Von Schweikert VR2Center: Von Schweikert LCR15 Subs: 2 SVS Sb13 Ultra (HT Only) Analysis Plus Cables
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  • HB27
    HB27 Posts: 1,518
    edited February 2010
    Jetmaker737 wrote: »
    The guy sounds like an ****.
    We all can be a..holes at times. I'm on a "Peace and Love" trip in this lifetime. It's been interrupted at times by happenstance like a long stint in the USMC and stuff like that but overall I'm a "what the f..k" kinda fella and material things don't mean a lot to me.
    I don't consider him an a..hole at all. I hope it's just an overload of circumstances playing a large role in all of this and all will be well.
    "Sit down over a couple of glasses of whisky? LOL! Yea right, Like I don't have enough personality disorders without fueling the fire. I limit myself to a few brandys and a good Cuban or Dominican on saturday nights.
    Besides, I'm getting too old to be burying bodies. It sounds like more work than I want to get into.
    Harry
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  • reeltrouble1
    reeltrouble1 Posts: 9,312
    edited February 2010
    I have been known to slap the occasional polkie (with love of course) as part of their audio mentoring process. If I give someone something to use/try/play with I understand they may bust it, I do not expect them to pay for it, of course I give this sort of stuff to friends. Sometimes they just fix it, if they damaged their gear I try to help them fix their gear, but its all just part of the journey.

    RT1
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  • mdaudioguy
    mdaudioguy Posts: 5,165
    edited February 2010
    Wait! Is this Club Polk or Dear Abby? ;)
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  • HB27
    HB27 Posts: 1,518
    edited February 2010
    Dear Abby...
    My friend finally read this thread. (wink)
    Maybe I'm not really the laid back old country boy I appear to be.
    He does occasionally browse here since I've got him listening to Polks's at home now.
    The healing process begins as things have cooled down quite a bit.
    Communications are opened back up and hopefully this will blow over and end on a positive note.
    Thanks to all for lending a hand in this....This is a great "Advice Column"
    Harry
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  • dfranks
    dfranks Posts: 207
    edited February 2010
    Go hit on his wife! Then he won't care about his components anymore.
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