New Service I Can Provide (Local Only)

George Grand
George Grand Posts: 12,258
edited October 2008 in For Sale (FS) Classifieds
Being a member here, I see a lot of people throwing a lot of cash at a lot of good equipment. Many times this is to create the "home theater" experience in their own home. In my estimation, many will come close, but few will succeed. Here's why ......

You have no realism whatsoever until you hire me to come to your home and act boorishly while you're watching movies. Level and duration of boorishness can be agreed upon on paper prior to execution. We could have pre-arranged "code-words" that your family doesn't need to be in on, in order to add to the realism of that movie theater experience! Want your wife's bag stolen too? Just ask.

For right now I'm going to have to stay local area only, but if this takes-off, who knows. Maybe down the road I could bring on some help. So, I'm here and ready in the South/Central Jersey area, waiting for your call or PM.

(I fall asleep about 10 or 11 so if you watch movies later than that, don't hire me cause you probably won't get your money's worth.)
Post edited by George Grand on
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  • Face
    Face Posts: 14,340
    edited October 2008
    Retirement finally kicking in?

    :D:D
    "He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And when you gaze long into an abyss the abyss also gazes into you." Friedrich Nietzsche
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  • skipf
    skipf Posts: 694
    edited October 2008
    George, as long as you promise to watch all movies beforehand so you will be able to give away the plots, comment on upcoming scenes, etc. Oh yeah, you must bring your cell and talk on it incessantly.:D
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  • George Grand
    George Grand Posts: 12,258
    edited October 2008
    That's what the contract will be for Skip. No misunderstandings regarding performance.
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  • cfrizz
    cfrizz Posts: 13,415
    edited October 2008
    ROTFLMAO!!!!!!

    George you are too much! Thanks for the laugh.
    Marantz AV-7705 PrePro, Classé 5 channel 200wpc Amp, Oppo 103 BluRay, Rotel RCD-1072 CDP, Sony XBR-49X800E TV, Polk S60 Main Speakers, Polk ES30 Center Channel, Polk S15 Surround Speakers SVS SB12-NSD x2
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  • BIZILL
    BIZILL Posts: 5,432
    edited October 2008
    george, can i get you to dispose of your bubble gum beneath my leather recliners?

    POLK SDA-SRS 1.2TL -- ADCOM GFA-5802
    PANASONIC PT-AE4000U -- DIY WILSONART DW 135" 2.35:1 SCREEN
     ONKYO TX-SR805
    CENTER: CSI5
    MAINS: RTI8'S
    SURROUNDS: RTI8'S
    7.1 SURROUNDS: RTI6'S
    SUB: SVS PB12-PLUS/2 (12.3 series)
    XBOX 360    WiiPS3/blu-rayTOSHIBA HD-A35 hd dvd

    http://polkarmy.com/forums/index.php
    bobman1235 wrote:
    I have no facts to back that up, but I never let facts get in the way of my arguments.
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  • dcmeigs
    dcmeigs Posts: 708
    edited October 2008
    Can I buy a franchise? This is an idea with legs and quite recession proof.
    The world is full of answers, some are right and some are wrong. - Neil Young
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  • mhardy6647
    mhardy6647 Posts: 33,804
    edited October 2008
    don't forget to leave your cell phone on.
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  • BIZILL
    BIZILL Posts: 5,432
    edited October 2008
    got any grandbabies that can cry throughout the entirety? oh, and be sure to spill some soda as you depart. perhaps even rest your feet upon my headrest or at least bumb the seatback with your nervous leg.

    POLK SDA-SRS 1.2TL -- ADCOM GFA-5802
    PANASONIC PT-AE4000U -- DIY WILSONART DW 135" 2.35:1 SCREEN
     ONKYO TX-SR805
    CENTER: CSI5
    MAINS: RTI8'S
    SURROUNDS: RTI8'S
    7.1 SURROUNDS: RTI6'S
    SUB: SVS PB12-PLUS/2 (12.3 series)
    XBOX 360    WiiPS3/blu-rayTOSHIBA HD-A35 hd dvd

    http://polkarmy.com/forums/index.php
    bobman1235 wrote:
    I have no facts to back that up, but I never let facts get in the way of my arguments.
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  • Face
    Face Posts: 14,340
    edited October 2008
    Be sure to drink a half gallon of milk beforehand.
    "He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And when you gaze long into an abyss the abyss also gazes into you." Friedrich Nietzsche
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  • dkg999
    dkg999 Posts: 5,647
    edited October 2008
    I think the people who write for the audio rags are probably going to hit you with some type of copyright infringement suit ;)
    DKG999
    HT System: LSi9, LSiCx2, LSiFX, LSi7, SVS 20-39 PC+, B&K 507.s2 AVR, B&K Ref 125.2, Tripplite LCR-2400, Cambridge 650BD, Signal Cable PC/SC, BJC IC, Samsung 55" LED

    Music System: Magnepan 1.6QR, SVS SB12+, ARC pre, Parasound HCA1500 vertically bi-amped, Jolida CDP, Pro-Ject RM5.1SE TT, Pro-Ject TubeBox SE phono pre, SBT, PS Audio DLIII DAC
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  • Fireman32
    Fireman32 Posts: 4,845
    edited October 2008
    Wayyyy to funny George.
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  • hearingimpared
    hearingimpared Posts: 21,137
    edited October 2008
    Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ROTF!!!!
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  • jaysonbarnett
    jaysonbarnett Posts: 257
    edited October 2008
    I am going to watch all 130 VHS tapes of the O.J simpson trial. I think this is something you can watch after 10:00 since everyone will be asleep. I will need to borrow a VHS player since mine broke in 1985
    Audio:
    Onkyo :tx-sr805
    Polk: rti8's
    Polk: rti4's
    Polk: fxi3's
    Polk: csi'3
    Velodyne: VRP 1200
    Epik: Caliber
    Video:
    Panasonic:TH-42PX60U 42"Plasma
    Power Conditioner:
    Monster Power    : HTS 3600 MKII Home Theater
    Dvd:
    Sony: BDP-350
    Game Systems
    WII
    PS3
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  • George Grand
    George Grand Posts: 12,258
    edited October 2008
    Almost everything is on the table for this one. Imagine the cred you'll gain with your kids (as well as the little lady) when, in a very manly fashion, you stand up and order me to STFU as I'm gabbing into a cell. With my Blue Ribbon/No Stone Unturned level service, I could even blink, flinch, or cower when you do it. All three at the same time? Start writing the check! The possibilities are endless, as are the potential rewards.

    Milk is off the table cause that's only going to get you a melted throne, and if your kids hit me I'm hitting them back.

    Call today 1-800-TORMENT
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  • Strong Bad
    Strong Bad Posts: 4,278
    edited October 2008
    This is EXACTELY the type of service I need to impress some hot stripper!

    George, I have a few other requests...

    1. You must wear baggy baggy baggy jeans that hang down to crotch level and show your boxer shorts.

    2. You need to wear a XXXXL long sleeve "Thug Wear" shirt.

    3. New York Yankees baseball cap turned to the side. YES, it has to be a Yankees cap as that displays maximum thugness.

    4. Basketball shoes with over sized laces....untied.

    5. When talking on the cell phone, I want to hear lots of "Yeah ****!" "Thats right **** fuc***!!!" and lots of stuff along those lines.

    I move in this weekend to my new home and will promptly get the HT setup, then we talk about your services.

    Oh god this is awesome! My own "Rent a Thug" to threaten and make me look badass in my own Home Theater!!!
    No excuses!
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  • George Grand
    George Grand Posts: 12,258
    edited October 2008
    John. You can sign up now for my After I'm Dead level service. That's the only way I'm putting a Yankee hat on my head.
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  • Strong Bad
    Strong Bad Posts: 4,278
    edited October 2008
    Ok, I'll settle for your corpse. I'll try the "Weekend at Bernie's" thing.
    No excuses!
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  • shack
    shack Posts: 11,154
    edited October 2008
    Do you take Pay-Pal?
    "Just because you’re offended doesn’t mean you’re right." - Ricky Gervais

    "For those who believe, no proof is necessary. For those who don't believe, no proof is possible." - Stuart Chase

    "Consistency requires you to be as ignorant today as you were a year ago." - Bernard Berenson
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  • stubby
    stubby Posts: 723
    edited October 2008
    Damn. Was kinda hoping this was gonna be a hit man service. Oh well, I'm not very local anyway.

    stubby
    SRS 3.1TL
    Harman Kardon Citation 5.1
    Anthem AVM2



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  • George Grand
    George Grand Posts: 12,258
    edited October 2008
    Stubby, call me. Wait until I come back from visiting Shack though. I'll call YOU.
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  • reeltrouble1
    reeltrouble1 Posts: 9,312
    edited October 2008
    I got something you can service. Bring a new wax seal with you.

    RT1
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  • audiobliss
    audiobliss Posts: 12,518
    edited October 2008
    Oh wow, that was worth a BIG laugh!

    Waaaahahaha!
    George Grand wrote: »
    Jstas wrote: »
    Simple question. If you had a cool million bucks, what would you do with it?
    Wonder WTF happened to the rest of my money.
    In Use
    PS3, Yamaha CDR-HD1300, Plex, Amazon Fire TV Gen 2
    Pioneer Elite VSX-52, Parasound HCA-1000A
    Klipsch RF-82ii, RC-62ii, RS-42ii, RW-10d
    Epson 8700UB
    In Storage
    [Home Audio]
    Rotel RCD-02, Yamaha KX-W900U, Sony ST-S500ES, Denon DP-7F
    Pro-Ject Phono Box MKII, Parasound P/HP-850, ASL Wave 20 monoblocks
    Klipsch RF-35, RB-51ii
    [Car Audio]
    Pioneer Premier DEH-P860MP, Memphis 16-MCA3004, Boston Acoustic RC520
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  • george daniel
    george daniel Posts: 12,096
    edited October 2008
    This is too much,LOL,,maybe you could **** alot,while eating/spilling popcorn(the really greasy kind) and leaving fingerprints on the screen,,while pointing to the characters and screaming,,"watch this guy,watch this guy",,,,kinda like a color commentary while the movie is playing,,,oh yeah,,, a bowtie,,,you gotta wear a bowtie. :D:eek:

    I'm aquiring a mental "picture' of this,, I think you will make millions,,millions,I tell ya.;)
    JC approves....he told me so. (F-1 nut)
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