Found this in a blog, we all know someone like this

BaggedLancer
BaggedLancer Posts: 6,371
edited July 2008 in The Clubhouse
Posted in a blog my cousin sent me:
Here in NYC, you get quite a few gold diggers. Fair enough, as there are plenty of wealthy, shallow men as well. Sadly, the poor lass in the following post seems to be having a hard time finding the right man. This appeared on craigslist personals a few days ago and is becoming an instant classic:

> What am I doing wrong?
>
>
> Okay, I’m tired of beating around the bush. I’m a beautiful
> (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I’m articulate and classy.
> I’m not from New York. I’m looking to get married to a guy who makes at
> least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind
> that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don’t think
> I’m overreaching at all.
>
> Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could
> you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around
> 200 - 250. But that’s where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won’t get
> me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married
> to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she’s not as pretty as
> I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I
> get to her level?
>
> Here are my questions specifically:
>
> - Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars,
> restaurants, gyms
>
> -What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won’t hurt my
> feelings
>
> -Is there an age range I should be targeting (I’m 25)?
>
> - Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east
> side so plain? I’ve seen really ‘plain jane’ boring types who have
> nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I’ve seen drop dead
> gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What’s the story
> there?
>
> - Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment
> banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they
> hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?
>
> - How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for
> MARRIAGE ONLY
>
> Please hold your insults - I’m putting myself out there in an honest
> way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I’m being up front
> about it. I wouldn’t be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn’t
> able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a
> nice home and hearth.
>
> * it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with
> services or
> other commercial interests
>
> PostingID: 432279810
> THE ANSWER
> Dear Pers-431649184:
> I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully
> about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
> Firstly, I’m not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your
> bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here’s how I
> see it.
>
> Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a
> cr@ppy business deal. Here’s why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you
> suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring
> my money. Fine, simple. But here’s the rub, your looks will fade and my
> money will likely continue into perpetuity…in fact, it is very likely
> that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won’t
> be getting any more beautiful!
>
> So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning
> asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation
> accelerates! Let me explain, you’re 25 now and will likely stay pretty
> hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in
> earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!
>
> So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy
> and hold…hence the rub…marriage. It doesn’t make good business sense
> to “buy you” (which is what you’re asking) so I’d rather lease. In case
> you think I’m being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were
> to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It’s
> as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.
>
> Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So,
> I wonder why a girl as “articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful”
> as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to
> believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K
> hasn’t found you, if not only for a tryout.
>
> By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then
> we wouldn’t need to have this difficult conversation.
>
> With all that said, I must say you’re going about it the right way.
> Classic “pump and dump.”
> I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of
> lease, let me know.
Post edited by BaggedLancer on
· Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Comments