Favorite Puns

candyliquor35m
candyliquor35m Posts: 2,267
edited February 2008 in The Clubhouse
1. Poker I did
2. Soak it in cider
3. A couple about getting eight more that I'll keep to myself :D
Post edited by candyliquor35m on
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  • Skynut
    Skynut Posts: 2,967
    edited February 2008
    Liquor in the front and poker in the rear

    She aint much of a wrestler but you should see her box
    Skynut
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  • unc2701
    unc2701 Posts: 3,587
    edited February 2008
    What's the difference between a sorority and a circus?

    A circus is a cunning array of stunts.
    Gallo Ref 3.1 : Bryston 4b SST : Musical fidelity CD Pre : VPI HW-19
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  • obieone
    obieone Posts: 5,077
    edited February 2008
    ****? Damn near killed him!
    I refuse to argue with idiots, because people can't tell the DIFFERENCE!
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  • Face
    Face Posts: 14,340
    edited February 2008
    The empty can rattles the most.
    "He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And when you gaze long into an abyss the abyss also gazes into you." Friedrich Nietzsche
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  • BaggedLancer
    BaggedLancer Posts: 6,371
    edited February 2008
    Early worm gets the bird.
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  • hearingimpared
    hearingimpared Posts: 21,136
    edited February 2008
    He who eat jellley bean **** in techncnicolor.
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  • dave shepard
    dave shepard Posts: 1,334
    edited February 2008
    It takes a big man to cry.......

    And an even bigger man to laugh at that man.
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  • unc2701
    unc2701 Posts: 3,587
    edited February 2008
    errr.... Those last few aren't puns?
    Gallo Ref 3.1 : Bryston 4b SST : Musical fidelity CD Pre : VPI HW-19
    Gallo Ref AV, Frankengallo Ref 3, LC60i : Bryston 9b SST : Meridian 565
    Jordan JX92s : MF X-T100 : Xray v8
    Backburner:Krell KAV-300i
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  • mrmusicman
    mrmusicman Posts: 303
    edited February 2008
    I'd rather have this bottle in front of me....than a frontal lobotomy.:D
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  • mrbigbluelight
    mrbigbluelight Posts: 9,838
    edited February 2008
    Omaha Steaks is branching out and offering seafood now.

    My order is being sent out COD.
    Sal Palooza
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  • george daniel
    george daniel Posts: 12,096
    edited February 2008
    Lasareath wrote: »
    Nice, isnt that from a Tom waits song?

    I thought it was John Prine:confused:
    JC approves....he told me so. (F-1 nut)
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  • skipf
    skipf Posts: 694
    edited February 2008
    The friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so, thereby proving that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
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  • Early B.
    Early B. Posts: 7,900
    edited February 2008
    The blonde pirate said to the captain -- "You can hold my chest but don't be a boob and grab my booty." He replied, "It'll be my pleasure to cherish your treasure. But without your booty, I'll make it my duty to whack the one-eyed willie."
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    "God grooves with tubes."
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  • candyliquor35m
    candyliquor35m Posts: 2,267
    edited February 2008
    1. 15 will get you 20
    2. Seymore Heiney
    3. Do you have Prince Albert in a can
    4. Is your refrigerator running
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  • zingo
    zingo Posts: 11,258
    edited February 2008
    mrbigbluelight wrote: »
    Omaha Steaks is branching out and offering seafood now.

    My order is being sent out COD.

    Fantastic. And a lot of these are adages or quotes, not necessarily puns; but carry one friends. I enjoy the giggle.
    Jake
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  • candyliquor35m
    candyliquor35m Posts: 2,267
    edited February 2008
    The manager of the truck stop in my home town was named Harry Pitts :)

    Truth.
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