Daughter and MP3 player

daboyz

Putting this one in all your hands. First day of school and my 12 year old got her SanDisk Sansa e250 stolen from her backpack.:( :mad: Talking to the school or the bus company will be a colossal waste of time so do I:

1: Buy her a new one and tell her to be more careful

2: Buy her a new one for home and a cheaper one for school

3: Tell her to save money to get her own

4: Do nothing


It's too bad there are kids out there whose parents haven't taught them right from wrong but I suppose this isn't a new subject. I still don't officially know because she's afraid to tell me.

Thanks, Dave

treitz3

Number 3 [Hey, I like the number:D ]

What the hell does she need one of those in school for anyway?

audiobliss

Good point. At 18 - 25 it's ridiculous how many kids walk around my community college wearing earbuds. At 12?? She (in my humble opinion) shouldn't be using one at all except on a road trip.

daboyz

35-40 min. bus trip 1 way

Serendipity

#3 - I don't think this is a "need," it's more of a "want."

audiobliss

I can see why for a long commute like that. But I still think socialization and actually reading (either for fun or class) should come first. I mean, it won't be too long before the bus ride is the ONLY place she does her homework.

daboyz

Straight "A" student. I have never had to worry about that. Does anyone know where to pick up refurbs or had any experience?

Rivrrat

I'd probably get her another one after a couple of weeks of sweating, and tell her this is it.

I'd do an I-pod shuffle for 50 bucks.

http://store.apple.com/1-800-MY-APPLE/WebObjects/AppleStore.woa/wa/RSLID?nnmm=browse&mco=EC0F3C63&node=home/specialdeals/ipod

bruss

Check overstock.com

Bill Ayotte

That little shuffle is pretty sweet.....The one I bought my mom a few months back is now mine....:D

She liked the old shuffle better...I guess she has a problems with the clip on the new one....

RuSsMaN

Go ahead with 1, and stress 3 is the option that will follow should it happen again.

A side note on the Shuffle (have two in house), it has programmable volume control built into the software so she CAN'T turn it up too loud.

Cheers,
Russ

cfrizz

Tell her to read a book! Giving a kid a piece of gear like that is just asking for trouble. The second someone spots it & wants it, it is going to be stolen again.

Being surrounded by bullies is just a fact of life when you go to school, even when you don't have some fancy piece of gear. So that gear is just asking for trouble.

exalted512

RuSsMaN wrote: »

Go ahead with 1, and stress 3 is the option that will follow should it happen again.

A side note on the Shuffle (have two in house), it has programmable volume control built into the software so she CAN'T turn it up too loud.

Cheers,
Russ

I agree with this. Kids arent stupid. She knows she needs to be more careful now and she obviously feels horrible about it because she hasnt even told you yet. Maybe just tell her to put it in another pocket instead of the small ones so it wont be as easy to find.
-Cody

shack

She is a good kid, makes good grades, has a good reason for having one (the long bus ride) and other than possibly not being careful enough, she lost her MP3 player through no fault of her own.

I would replace the player (and have done similar thing for my daughters who fit the description of your daughter).

However, there should be a price to pay. Some sort of chore or activity that is not part of her nomal routine. I tried to make it some sort of charitable task that would benefit someone else...like offering to help an elderly person clean up their yard or help with the younger kids in the pre-school at our church. Something that made them earn the replacement of the lost item (even adults have to pay for replacement insurance - another lesson learned) and gave them a sense of helping others. Just a thought.

Willow

shack wrote: »

However, there should be a price to pay. Some sort of chore or activity that is not part of her nomal routine. I tried to make it some sort of charitable task that would benefit someone else...like offering to help an elderly person clean up their yard or help with the younger kids in the pre-school at our church. Something that made them earn the replacement of the lost item (even adults have to pay for replacement insurance - another lesson learned) and gave them a sense of helping others. Just a thought.

Fantastic idea Shack !

janmike

Agreed as well. Excellent idea Shack. Spoken from real life experience.

Frank Z

If you opt to get her a new one...permanently mark it.

As far as notifying the school...hell yes! Crap like this needs to be reported. No you may never see it again, but the school needs to be made aware of the theft.

BaggedLancer

I started writing a reply to this last night but apparently I must have fallen asleep and closed it.

Definately can't go with option 3, she is only 12. However, like others have stated there are plenty of chores she can do or something charitable for someone else.

I definately wouldn't just buy another one and hand it to her, that doesn't teach you a thing and that's how the majority of my friends were brought up and still are(now at 22 years old). Avoid the buy this and hand off mentality if you can.

thejck

number 3. kids will loose out on learning from their interaction with friends and people around them if they walk around with their ears blocked.
what kind of music does she listen too at 12. girls singing about thier hearts being broken or tears that are shed or sleeping with guys. now get her some classical music. heard they actully make you smarter.

if the player got stolen and it was not her fault dont make it out like a punishment. cause it was not her fault. but make it out as a learning experience.

MSALLA

I would replace it for her but I'm a softy when it comes to girls. If she lost it or broke it, I would make her work it off but it was stolen. I would also tell her this is a one time deal.A "you know what can happen so you need to be responsable for your things" speech may be in order.

irishaz

FWIW, I have three twelve year olds - yes, triplets. It has been my experience that they place very little value on things that they are given and much more on things that they earn. A sense of accomplishment and pride of ownership are extremely important things to cultivate. I would provide my kids opportunities to earn the money (extra chores, etc.) and congratulate them when they reached their goal.

cfrizz

Very good idea! By the time she has earned the money to be able to get it again, she will never let it leave her sight & also learns the value of working for what she wants!

irishaz wrote: »

FWIW, I have three twelve year olds - yes, triplets. It has been my experience that they place very little value on things that they are given and much more on things that they earn. A sense of accomplishment and pride of ownership are extremely important things to cultivate. I would provide my kids opportunities to earn the money (extra chores, etc.) and congratulate them when they reached their goal.

audiobliss

I guess I'm just gonna be a mean 'ol pop, but I still would rather her talk with other kids and/or read a book (even just for fun).

dudeinaroom

audiobliss wrote: »

I guess I'm just gonna be a mean 'ol pop, but I still would rather her talk with other kids and/or read a book (even just for fun).

+1 on that. I used to have an hour bus ride one way when I was in school. If you take something to school it will get stolen. Besides some of the best times I had on the in school was on the bus, and if I had electronics in my ears, I would have missed a lot of fun.

treitz3

dudeinaroom wrote:

....Besides some of the best times I had on the in school was on the bus....

Boy oh boy that statement brought back a lot of good memories!

exalted512

treitz3 wrote: »

Boy oh boy that statement brought back a lot of good memories!

After thinking about this, I'd much rather have my daughter keeping to herself listening to her mp3 player...

Sherardp

treitz3 wrote: »

Boy oh boy that statement brought back a lot of good memories!

+2 on this, tons of memories on the bus to and from school. From water gun fights to throwing paper balls. Never got caught, doing either. Awesome fun. And on other days, it was good sleep on the way home.

bdaley6509

I'd buy her a new one. I'd keep buying her new ones as long as her grades are good. Especially straight A's. Of course, I'd educate her on keeping the equipment safe from theft and the like.

BaggedLancer

zip tie it to her backpack so no little bully can steal it

cfrizz

Have her work & buy another one for herself, and she will educate herself REAL quickly about keeping it safe since she actually had to work to get it.

bdaley6509 wrote: »

I'd buy her a new one. I'd keep buying her new ones as long as her grades are good. Especially straight A's. Of course, I'd educate her on keeping the equipment safe from theft and the like.

JimBRICK

daboyz wrote: »

Putting this one in all your hands. First day of school and my 12 year old got her SanDisk Sansa e250 stolen from her backpack.:( :mad: Talking to the school or the bus company will be a colossal waste of time so do I:

1: Buy her a new one and tell her to be more careful

2: Buy her a new one for home and a cheaper one for school

3: Tell her to save money to get her own

4: Do nothing


It's too bad there are kids out there whose parents haven't taught them right from wrong but I suppose this isn't a new subject. I still don't officially know because she's afraid to tell me.

Thanks, Dave

I think option 3 is your best bet, buying something with her own money will teach her to keep a better eye on it.