WTB Good Woman

ben62670

I am looking for a good Woman. Its probably easier to buy one than spend all the money on awkward stuff like dates, dinners, and presents. A lot of the time you just find out that the person you are interested in just isn't for you. I am looking for a Woman who doesn't have expensive tastes. Is comfortable living in a "warehouse type environment". It would be nice to have someone to cuddle with seeing I don't have any heat, and there is a cold spell, and the temps should be down to 40. If her eyes don't see so well that would be a plus. Days like today when I'm not really into the "hygiene thing" a little fuzzy vision would go a long way. Come to think about it if her nose wasn't sensitive that would be a bonus too (gotta make that tooth paste go a little further). I don't mind if she is a little overweight, or not that pretty. She would be less likely to sleep with my friends. It would be all right if she was in a wheel chair too. My EX wife is trying to move to Atlanta, and I live in S Fla. 11 hours from Atlanta. If my new woman was in a wheelchair it would be harder to take the kids from me. In fact it would be harder to leave me too. My dog left me. I went to Walmart, and got a new pet. The lady who helped me make my decision was very nice. I told her about my dog, and she recommended goldfish. They can't run away. If my X moves to GA with the kids I can move the goldfish into the living room next to the couch, so I don't feel lonely so much. I could also talk to them. I have been watching my TV quit a bit lately. My kids are in NY for a while. I don't turn the TV on because it is usually is depressing. I just watch it while its off. It uses less electricity that way too. I don't have any money so I don't want to waste electricity. Come to think about it to broke to buy a women please disregard this post.

gwh

http://www.prankplace.com/inflatables.htm?KBID=1103&sub=inflatables&gclid=CKeil5S4uYoCFQ6kWAodgmo4uQ

ben62670

I have had bad luck with Blonds. I do like the handy lunch box style case, and the price is right.
Thanks gwh

Oh yeah about the pig...
It is the only farm animal you can't have sex with...
It'll squeal on you :eek:

hearingimpared

ben62670 wrote:

I am looking for a good Woman. Its probably easier to buy one than spend all the money on awkward stuff like dates, dinners, and presents. A lot of the time you just find out that the person you are interested in just isn't for you. I am looking for a Woman who doesn't have expensive tastes. Is comfortable living in a "warehouse type environment". It would be nice to have someone to cuddle with seeing I don't have any heat, and there is a cold spell, and the temps should be down to 40. If her eyes don't see so well that would be a plus. Days like today when I'm not really into the "hygiene thing" a little fuzzy vision would go a long way. Come to think about it if her nose wasn't sensitive that would be a bonus too (gotta make that tooth paste go a little further). I don't mind if she is a little overweight, or not that pretty. She would be less likely to sleep with my friends. It would be all right if she was in a wheel chair too. My EX wife is trying to move to Atlanta, and I live in S Fla. 11 hours from Atlanta. If my new woman was in a wheelchair it would be harder to take the kids from me. In fact it would be harder to leave me too. My dog left me. I went to Walmart, and got a new pet. The lady who helped me make my decision was very nice. I told her about my dog, and she recommended goldfish. They can't run away. If my X moves to GA with the kids I can move the goldfish into the living room next to the couch, so I don't feel lonely so much. I could also talk to them. I have been watching my TV quit a bit lately. My kids are in NY for a while. I don't turn the TV on because it is usually is depressing. I just watch it while its off. It uses less electricity that way too. I don't have any money so I don't want to waste electricity. Come to think about it to broke to buy a women please disregard this post.

My shrink has an appointment open tomorrow at 10:30 AM. . . he read this thread and told me he would meet you at your place!!!:D

ben62670

hearingimpared wrote:

My shrink has an appointment open tomorrow at 10:30 AM. . . he read this thread and told me he would meet you at your place!!!:D

Tell him to come during the day its safer.

ben62670

Too bad I can't sing. I could be one of those American Idols. You know write country songs about how my life sucks, and turn it to millions. Then we would see who's laughing. Yep then we would see.

gwh

If the plastic gals are out of you price range then try some of these lines out on the cuties at your local grocery store or bowling ally.....One might just come home with you for free!

1) Did you ****?

cuz you blew me away.

2) Are yer parents retarded?

cuz ya sure are special.

3) My love fer you is like diarrhea .

I can't hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card?

cuz I'd like to check you out.

5) Is there a mirror in yer pants?

cuz I can see myself in em.

6) If you was a tree and I were a Squirrel,

I'd store my nuts in yer hole.

7) You might not be the best lookin girl here,

but beauty's only a light switch away.

8) Man - "Fat Penguin!"
Woman - "WHAT?"
Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."

9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone,

but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.

10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him?

I think he went inta this cheap motel room.

11) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner.

12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin,

we kin sleep til afternoon.

ben62670

I like 7,9, and 11

ledhed

ben62670 wrote:

Too bad I can't sing. I could be one of those American Idols. You know write country songs about how my life sucks, and turn it to millions. Then we would see who's laughing. Yep then we would see.

When has lack of vocal talent stopped a country musician?

ben62670

ledhed wrote:

When has lack of vocal talent stopped a country musician?

You made me laugh, and snot shot out my nose and onto my shirt:eek:
gotta finda tissue

Harvey/ Ga

ben62670 wrote:

Too bad I can't sing. I could be one of those American Idols. You know write country songs about how my life sucks, and turn it to millions. Then we would see who's laughing. Yep then we would see.

Then, she's sue for more child support, and you'd be right back where you started :eek:

dorokusai

A "good" woman should be willing to punch you in the nuts if asked directly, most of them say no.

treitz3

A good woman never, ever, ever says...."honey, can you turn it down?":D

ben62670

treitz3 wrote:

A good woman never, ever, ever says...."honey, can you turn it down?":D

http://www.polkaudio.com/forums/showthread.php?t=49081&page=2&highlight=how+loud+demo

Post 42

and she LOVES my kids

louthewiz

Here is the perfect virgin ,all ready to be spoiled.:D

treitz3

Ben62670.......From the post #42, and I quote......

"I turned it down, and she asked me if I could turn it back up."

I stand erected. THAT, my friend, is a Damn fine woman. Damn fine, I tell ya'!:D

ben62670

Everything else can be compensated for by a light switch

pentium

ben62670 wrote:

Everything else can be compensated for by a light switch

I am not expert in this matter, however i think if you stop thinking about women as "light switch" compensation, maybe they stop running from you.

ben62670

pentium wrote:

I am not expert in this matter, however i think if you stop thinking about women as "light switch" compensation, maybe they stop running from you.

I am being a smart arse. This particular lady doesn't need the usage of the light switch. :rolleyes: