Fun things to do at Wal-Mart!

gmorris
gmorris Posts: 1,179
edited March 2024 in Clubhouse Archives
Have an Extra-Specially Fun Time At Wal-Mart!

1. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.

2. Make a trail of orange juice on the floor, leading to
the restrooms.

3. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone,
"I think we've got a Code 3 in housewares," and see what
happens.

4. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them
all off and turn the volumes to "10."

5. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift
wrap.

6. Put M&M's on layaway.

7. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.

8. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others
you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from
Bed and Bath.

9. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and
ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"

10. Look right into the security camera, and use it as
a mirror while you pick your nose.

11. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full
scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.

12. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

13. While handling guns in the hunting department, sud-
denly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants
are.

14. Switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of
the restrooms.

15. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme
from "Mission Impossible."

16. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

17. Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse
through, say things like "pick me! pick me!!"

18. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker,
assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's
those voices again!"

19. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink;
explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they
can put a little umbrella in it.

20. Go into the dressing room and yell real loud...
"Hey, we're out of toilet paper in here!"
Bob Mayo, on the keyboards. Bob Mayo.
Post edited by RyanC_Masimo on
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Comments

  • exalted512
    exalted512 Posts: 10,735
    edited November 2004
    lmao...thats gotta be one of the funniest things in a long time
    my favorite is number 13
    -Cody
    Music is like candy, you have to get rid of the rappers to enjoy it
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  • gmorris
    gmorris Posts: 1,179
    edited November 2004
    I gotta go with #2 & #15.
    Bob Mayo, on the keyboards. Bob Mayo.
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  • wlrandall
    wlrandall Posts: 440
    edited November 2004
    What's a Code 3 (see #3)??
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  • gmorris
    gmorris Posts: 1,179
    edited November 2004
    Originally posted by wlrandall
    What's a Code 3 (see #3)??

    Please tell me you're kidding?!
    Bob Mayo, on the keyboards. Bob Mayo.
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  • audiobliss
    audiobliss Posts: 12,518
    edited November 2004
    That is absolutely hilarious!!! And..I'd like to know what a code 3 is.....
    George Grand wrote: »
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    Wonder WTF happened to the rest of my money.
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  • gmorris
    gmorris Posts: 1,179
    edited November 2004
    I'm still hoping that you all are kidding about not knowing what a code 3 is, but if you really don't get it, I'll tell you.

    There is no such thing as a code 3, that is the whole point. It is funny that you would act like there is such a thing, then tell an employee of Walmart there is a code 3, but it is not real. Do you get it now? It's a joke......
    Bob Mayo, on the keyboards. Bob Mayo.
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  • BlueMDPicker
    BlueMDPicker Posts: 7,569
    edited November 2004
    21. Fracture the delicate sensibilities of therockman - since you can'd do it here any longer. :rolleyes:
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  • TheReaper
    TheReaper Posts: 636
    edited November 2004
    My favorite:

    When I set off that inventory alarm I keep walking (they can't do anything anyway).

    Then when I get to my car I find the offending transponder, and stick it on a shopping cart. :D
    Win7 Media Center -> Onkyo TXSR702 -> Polk Rti70
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  • wlrandall
    wlrandall Posts: 440
    edited November 2004
    Originally posted by gmorris
    I'm still hoping that you all are kidding about not knowing what a code 3 is, but if you really don't get it, I'll tell you.

    There is no such thing as a code 3, that is the whole point. It is funny that you would act like there is such a thing, then tell an employee of Walmart there is a code 3, but it is not real. Do you get it now? It's a joke......


    Hahahaha....guess I just passed the Walmart Entrance Exam!
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  • Demiurge
    Demiurge Posts: 10,874
    edited November 2004
    That's great stuff! :)
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  • VR3
    VR3 Posts: 28,932
    edited November 2004
    Man! Welcome back dude!

    I've read the 'chain email' before, but still cracks me up
    - Not Tom ::::::: Any system can play Diana Krall. Only the best can play Limp Bizkit.
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  • Demiurge
    Demiurge Posts: 10,874
    edited November 2004
    Thanks, Sid. :)
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  • fireshoes
    fireshoes Posts: 3,167
    edited November 2004
    Hey Demi, I didn't know you were back. Good to see you. Even though I was cracking on you that one night, I definitely wasn't looking for anyone to get banned out of the whole ordeal.
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  • Demiurge
    Demiurge Posts: 10,874
    edited November 2004
    Originally posted by fireshoes
    Hey Demi, I didn't know you were back. Good to see you. Even though I was cracking on you that one night, I definitely wasn't looking for anyone to get banned out of the whole ordeal.

    It was my fault.

    I've been going through some really lame stuff. I'm not looking for pity here & there's no excuse, but I'm sorry for saying the stuff I said.
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  • fireshoes
    fireshoes Posts: 3,167
    edited November 2004
    No problem at all man. It happens to everyone.
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  • exalted512
    exalted512 Posts: 10,735
    edited November 2004
    Originally posted by TheReaper
    When I set off that inventory alarm I keep walking (they can't do anything anyway).
    is that really true?
    that and they cant check your receipt?
    ive heard that before but no one ever really knew for sure...
    -Cody
    Music is like candy, you have to get rid of the rappers to enjoy it
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  • Tour2ma
    Tour2ma Posts: 10,177
    edited November 2004
    I liked 16... I've seen furs exit Mercedes and stroll into Wal-Mart...

    Welcome back Demi... Hope you got out of solitary early enough to see your Pack yesterday...
    More later,
    Tour...
    Vox Copuli
    Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt. - Old English Proverb

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  • TheReaper
    TheReaper Posts: 636
    edited November 2004
    Originally posted by exalted512
    is that really true?
    that and they cant check your receipt?
    ive heard that before but no one ever really knew for sure...
    -Cody
    It is all just a big show, to keep kids from shoplifting. In New York (and I imagine most states), once you are out the door, they can't involuntarily search you. If you aren't shoplifting, you can sue them, so wal-mart doesn't stop you. Most of the time that alarm goes off, it is a failure of one of their cashier's and they know it.

    The key is, if they ask you and you let them, it is legal. If they force you, and you aren't shoplifting, they are screwed.
    Win7 Media Center -> Onkyo TXSR702 -> Polk Rti70
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  • wodom1
    wodom1 Posts: 1,054
    edited November 2004
    Hey Demiurge,

    I got to see Wilco on Halloween night at the Auditorium Theatre in Chicago. Thanks for turning me on to them and welcome back to the forum.
    "I got into the music business thinking it was really radical, that it wasn't really a business at all, that it was a lot of people being artistic and creative. Not true, and it made me very depressed."

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  • exalted512
    exalted512 Posts: 10,735
    edited November 2004
    what about checking receits since you are in the store??
    or what about in a mall...youre out of the store, but youre still in the mall....
    -Cody
    Music is like candy, you have to get rid of the rappers to enjoy it
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  • wlrandall
    wlrandall Posts: 440
    edited November 2004
    Originally posted by exalted512
    what about checking receits since you are in the store??
    or what about in a mall...youre out of the store, but youre still in the mall....
    -Cody

    No, they have no real grounds to do that either. Once the transaction is complete, you own it, the receipt is your "title". I blow past the receipt **** in Walmart all the time. They yell at me, but not once have they tried to stop me. Screw them and their tactics.
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  • exalted512
    exalted512 Posts: 10,735
    edited November 2004
    i cant see the old grandmas that check the receipts here yelling at me for walking past them:confused:
    Music is like candy, you have to get rid of the rappers to enjoy it
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  • Demiurge
    Demiurge Posts: 10,874
    edited November 2004
    Originally posted by wodom1
    Hey Demiurge,

    I got to see Wilco on Halloween night at the Auditorium Theatre in Chicago. Thanks for turning me on to them and welcome back to the forum.

    Awesome! I'm glad you like them. Great show, huh?
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  • rskarvan
    rskarvan Posts: 2,374
    edited November 2004
    Ask the cute check-out girl if she was in Playboy's "Women of Walmart" feature?
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