Joke of the day

ninerbj
ninerbj Posts: 870
edited February 2024 in Clubhouse Archives
Are you a Democrat, a Republican or a Southern Republican? With
elections coming up, we should all decide. Here is a little test that
may help you decide.
Question: How do you tell the difference between a Democrat, a
Republican and a Southern Republican?
The answer can be found by posing the following question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes
around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the
knife, and charges. You are carrying a Glock 40, and you are an expert
shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Democrat's Answer: Well, that's not enough information to answer the
question! Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could
we run away?
What does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the
gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does
this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound
me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while
he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a
happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a
few days and try to come to a consensus.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Republican's Answer: BANG!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Southern Republican's Answer: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! click.....(sounds of reloading). BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click. Daughter's voice, "Nice grouping,
Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips??"
"she had the body of Venus, with arms."
Post edited by RyanC_Masimo on

Comments

  • I-SIG
    I-SIG Posts: 2,243
    edited August 2004
    I would only get caught dead carrying a Glop!

    Wes
    Link: http://polkarmy.com/forums

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  • PolkWannabie
    PolkWannabie Posts: 2,763
    edited August 2004
    I know this is a joke and imho an amusing one ... but still dangerously close to PP material ...
  • steveinaz
    steveinaz Posts: 19,538
    edited August 2004
    Originally posted by I-SIG
    I would only get caught dead carrying a Glop!

    Wes

    You realize of course that jealousy is the sincerest form of flattery?

    Still
    Isn't a
    Glock

    :D
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  • ninerbj
    ninerbj Posts: 870
    edited August 2004
    well...sometimes ya just gotta live outside the box
    shame on me:eek:
    "she had the body of Venus, with arms."
  • HBombToo
    HBombToo Posts: 5,256
    edited August 2004
    Originally posted by ninerbj


    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Republican's Answer: BANG!
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Southern Republican's Answer: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    BANG! BANG! click.....(sounds of reloading). BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click. Daughter's voice, "Nice grouping,
    Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips??"

    agreed but... how is it I don't own a pistol?

    Bomber
    ***WAREMTAE***
  • Joelsbass
    Joelsbass Posts: 637
    edited September 2004
    Originally posted by PolkWannabie
    I know this is a joke and imho an amusing one ... but still dangerously close to PP material ...


    wow... can we say legalistic???


    i'd say jokes like this are pretty far from needing to be put into the political forum... this is the perfect place for them...
    MacLeod: I guess youre lucky Polk has such lax hiring standards.

    Josh: Damn skippy!