Some one liners
phoneisbusy
Posts: 867
Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.
Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.
I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it. So I said Implants?" She hit me.
I don't do drugs. I get the same effect just standing up fast.
I live in my own little world. But it's OK. They know me here.
I got a sweater for Christmas. I really wanted a screamer or a moaner.
I don't approve of political jokes. I've seen too many of them get elected.
Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.
Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words: "Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been!"
A good friend will come and bail you out of jail...but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn...that was fun!"
I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!
When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky dunk."
Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.
Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?
If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called LABOUR!
Wouldn't you know it...Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FAT cells live forever.
Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.
I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it. So I said Implants?" She hit me.
I don't do drugs. I get the same effect just standing up fast.
I live in my own little world. But it's OK. They know me here.
I got a sweater for Christmas. I really wanted a screamer or a moaner.
I don't approve of political jokes. I've seen too many of them get elected.
Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.
Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words: "Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been!"
A good friend will come and bail you out of jail...but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn...that was fun!"
I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!
When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky dunk."
Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.
Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?
If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called LABOUR!
Wouldn't you know it...Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FAT cells live forever.
Time is the best teacher. Unfortunately it kills all its students.
Post edited by RyanC_Masimo on
Comments
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Political Correctness'.........defined
"A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a t-u-r-d by the clean end."
President of Club Polk -
Me like.:D Marantz AV-7705 PrePro, Classé 5 channel 200wpc Amp, Oppo 103 BluRay, Rotel RCD-1072 CDP, Sony XBR-49X800E TV, Polk S60 Main Speakers, Polk ES30 Center Channel, Polk S15 Surround Speakers SVS SB12-NSD x2
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haha!!
In UseGeorge Grand wrote: »
PS3, Yamaha CDR-HD1300, Plex, Amazon Fire TV Gen 2
Pioneer Elite VSX-52, Parasound HCA-1000A
Klipsch RF-82ii, RC-62ii, RS-42ii, RW-10d
Epson 8700UB
In Storage
[Home Audio]
Rotel RCD-02, Yamaha KX-W900U, Sony ST-S500ES, Denon DP-7F
Pro-Ject Phono Box MKII, Parasound P/HP-850, ASL Wave 20 monoblocks
Klipsch RF-35, RB-51ii
[Car Audio]
Pioneer Premier DEH-P860MP, Memphis 16-MCA3004, Boston Acoustic RC520 -
That was great!:DWish I was a polkologist then I could call my self Dr.warviper.
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