The Final Piece…
mrbiron
Posts: 5,711
No, this is not a mamby pamby puzzler post!
Guys,
Have you ever found yourself in this position?
I’m want you to read the following with Lord of the Rings Battle for Gondor soundtrack playing in your head.
My story began a short while ago while the wife and kids were heading out for a grocery run. I decide, now is my time. Now the true feats of strength shall begin. I make my way to the doorstep of hell and begin my preparations. I’m calm at first, but things start to take a turn. I see that a prior skirmish had taken place and the defending team had taken severe losses. I think to myself, even with the opposing army in its weakened state, I can claim the victory. I can come out of this with clean hands, so to speak, so I push on…
The house is now quiet and nobody will hear my pleads for help. I’m all alone, so again, I push on…
Soon, the playing field shifts! The final attack has me in a state of paralysis. I don’t know what to do. I’m sweating, nerves tingling, legs falling asleep, and heart rate set to maximum as I take my final breathe and pray…
…Pray that this marks the end of my journey…
…Pray that the suffering will end and no other evils will manifest…
…Pray that the last piece of toilet paper will be enough so I don’t have to shuffle myself across the bathroom, open the closet, and fish for a new roll with your pants around your ankles.
I ask you again, how many have been in this position?!?!
I was…………
…and the shuffle was an eternity…
It says it right in the description.
“The Club House: A place to relax and talk about your day”
😂
I just spent way too much time typing this.
Guys,
Have you ever found yourself in this position?
I’m want you to read the following with Lord of the Rings Battle for Gondor soundtrack playing in your head.
My story began a short while ago while the wife and kids were heading out for a grocery run. I decide, now is my time. Now the true feats of strength shall begin. I make my way to the doorstep of hell and begin my preparations. I’m calm at first, but things start to take a turn. I see that a prior skirmish had taken place and the defending team had taken severe losses. I think to myself, even with the opposing army in its weakened state, I can claim the victory. I can come out of this with clean hands, so to speak, so I push on…
The house is now quiet and nobody will hear my pleads for help. I’m all alone, so again, I push on…
Soon, the playing field shifts! The final attack has me in a state of paralysis. I don’t know what to do. I’m sweating, nerves tingling, legs falling asleep, and heart rate set to maximum as I take my final breathe and pray…
…Pray that this marks the end of my journey…
…Pray that the suffering will end and no other evils will manifest…
…Pray that the last piece of toilet paper will be enough so I don’t have to shuffle myself across the bathroom, open the closet, and fish for a new roll with your pants around your ankles.
I ask you again, how many have been in this position?!?!
I was…………
…and the shuffle was an eternity…
It says it right in the description.
“The Club House: A place to relax and talk about your day”
😂
I just spent way too much time typing this.
Where’s the KABOOM?!?! There’s supposed to be an Earth shattering KABOOM!!!
Comments
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I recently came under attack of the Chocolate Submarines myself. Though, it was more like Attack of the Mossy Oak Submarines, as I've added mixed greens and green superfood powder to my smoothie.I disabled signatures.
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I just spent way too much time typing this.
Next, try it in Haiku form. That'll fit on one piece of paper.
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I got stuck on the (very steep, at least relative to my comfort level) roof at our house in MA once when the ladder I was using kicked when I was washing skylights - and no one else was home. I sort of clung to one of the skylights' frames (with feet still on the ladder, which was metastable) while I waited for my son to get home from some activity he was on.
It was only about a half hour, and it was a very nice day -- but it was unnerving (and a bit embarrassing).
Is that close?
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Mr. H.
No, not even close, BUT you’re still my favorite person on this forum none the less.
Where’s the KABOOM?!?! There’s supposed to be an Earth shattering KABOOM!!! -
Took a morning poo
Cardboard backer peaked at me
Blast you damn roommates
Where’s the KABOOM?!?! There’s supposed to be an Earth shattering KABOOM!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gysu0kgFwT0