How Drunk Are You????

brettw22
brettw22 Posts: 7,623
edited February 2024 in Clubhouse Archives
Just somethin that I'm cutting and pasting from an email I got. I think I've seen it before, but dunno.......

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:

* Indubitably
* Preliminary
* Proliferation

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:

* Specificity
* Antidisestablishmentarianism
* Loquacious
* Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:

* Thanks, but I don't want to have sex.
* Nope, no more booze for me.
* Sorry, but you're not really my type.
* Oh, no, I just couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing.

Due to increasing product liability litigation,
American liquor manufacturers have accepted the
FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels
be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol
containers:

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you
wondering what the hell happened to your bra and
panties.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you
think you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major
factor in dancing like a ****.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you
to tell your friends over and over again that you
love them.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you
to think you can sing.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to
believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to
telephone them at four in the morning.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you
think you can logically converse with other members
of the opposite sex without spitting.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading
cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead, knees
and lower back.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the
illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and
better looking than most people.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to
think people are laughing WITH you.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.

WARNING: The crumsumpten of alcahol may mack you tink
you can tipe reel gude.
comment comment comment comment. bitchy.
Post edited by RyanC_Masimo on
· Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Comments

  • Loud & Clear
    Loud & Clear Posts: 1,538
    edited January 2004
    First time I've seen that. Funny stuff. I know for a fact that I think I'm really fast when I'm drunk, and I don't shy away from telling people about it either.

    Two Channel Setup:

    Speakers: Wharfedale Opus 2-3
    Integrated Amp: Krell S-300i
    DAC: Arcam irDac
    Source: iMac
    Remote Control: iPad Mini

    3.2 Home Theater Setup:

    Fronts: Klipsch RP-160M
    Center: Klipsch RP-160M
    Subwoofer: SVS PB12NSD (X 2)
    AVR: Yamaha Aventage RX-A2030
    Blu Ray: Sony BDP-S790
    TV Source: DirecTV Genie
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • goingganzo
    goingganzo Posts: 2,793
    edited January 2004
    dand i guess you fugured out that i am allways drunk when on here lol.
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • brettw22
    brettw22 Posts: 7,623
    edited January 2004
    LOL......as soon as I saw that Ganzo had replied, I thought about going up and adding one last one:

    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to type like Ganzo...

    I guess that the last one implies the same thing.....:D
    comment comment comment comment. bitchy.
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Pauly
    Pauly Posts: 4,519
    edited January 2004
    too drunk to read it...will read tomorrow at work :cool:
    Life without music would♭
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter