Just a Few Jokes.
Polk-a-nizer
Posts: 225
Feel free to add your whiticisms here. Jokes appreciated.
Lone Ranger and Tonto are drinking by a fire. Lone Ranger says, "I gotta take a piss"; And walks into the bushes. All've a sudden Tonto hears a muffled "sonofabitch" from the bush nearby. Lone Ranger comes out holding his balls. Tonto says "what happen kimosabe ". Lone Ranger says "I was takin a leak and a snake bit me on the balls. You have to go to town and get a doctor." Tonto jumped on his horse. Ranger said "take Silver, he's faster." Tonto hopped on Silver and rode through the woods and accross the desert, into the mountains and down into the valley. He stumbled into the Doc's office half beat and exhausted. "Quick ", he says. "My friend got bit by evil snake, what will save him ". Doc says "well son you gotta suck out the poison." Tonto hopped back on Silver and rode up into the mountains and accross the desert, back into the woods. Lone Ranger was lying there blue in the face. He says "what did the Doc say Tonto." Tonto let out a sigh and clapped Lone on the shoulder. Looked him in the eye and said, YOU GONNA DIE KIMOSABE! ":D
Lone Ranger and Tonto are drinking by a fire. Lone Ranger says, "I gotta take a piss"; And walks into the bushes. All've a sudden Tonto hears a muffled "sonofabitch" from the bush nearby. Lone Ranger comes out holding his balls. Tonto says "what happen kimosabe ". Lone Ranger says "I was takin a leak and a snake bit me on the balls. You have to go to town and get a doctor." Tonto jumped on his horse. Ranger said "take Silver, he's faster." Tonto hopped on Silver and rode through the woods and accross the desert, into the mountains and down into the valley. He stumbled into the Doc's office half beat and exhausted. "Quick ", he says. "My friend got bit by evil snake, what will save him ". Doc says "well son you gotta suck out the poison." Tonto hopped back on Silver and rode up into the mountains and accross the desert, back into the woods. Lone Ranger was lying there blue in the face. He says "what did the Doc say Tonto." Tonto let out a sigh and clapped Lone on the shoulder. Looked him in the eye and said, YOU GONNA DIE KIMOSABE! ":D
Polk-A-Nizer~~Ulrich
Nizer The Wizer
"I can blast my Polks longer and they keep getting stronger!"
Nizer The Wizer
"I can blast my Polks longer and they keep getting stronger!"
Post edited by RyanC_Masimo on
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3 National Geographic Photographers get captured by a tribe of cannibals deep in the Congo.
They are placed side by side in a small tent and tied to a post.
The village chief comes in and points at the first photographer and says, "choose, death or unga bunga."
The guy says, "hell I don't wanna die, I'll choose unga bunga ."
The chiefs warriors escort him out and bring him back 30 minutes later.
The other guys ask him, "what happened."
He says, "man don't ask, you don't wanna know."
The chief comes back shortly and points to the 2nd guy.
"Choose, death or unga bunga ."
The guy says,"I just got married; I don't wanna die. I'll take unga bunga too."
They took him away and brought him back 3 hours later.
He was walking funny and winced when he sat down.;)
The last guy looks at him, "DAMMIT, tell me what happened!"
He says, "if you tell anybody..... they took me out and 1 by 1 the entire village **** me in the ****."
So then the Chief returns and points to the last guy.
"Choose, death or unga bunga ."
The last guy says, "**** that, I ain't going out like that. I'll choose death."
So the Chief and the elders talk amongst themselves.
The Chief comes back and says," Okay DEATH, by UNGA BUNGA ."
Moral of the story: Who's needs a damn moral. Think wisely.:cool:
Polk-A-Nizer~~Ulrich
Nizer The Wizer
"I can blast my Polks longer and they keep getting stronger!"