Legally Insane
trubluluc
Posts: 2,067
Hard to believe, or maybe not so hard to believe.
In a country where we strive everyday to prove Darwin was wrong,
and that yes a complete idiot can make a go of it, in fact prosper.
-luc
Subject: This is too funny......and it's true!
It's once again time to review the winners of the annual Stella
Awards. The Stella's are named after 81 year old Stella Liebeck who
spilled coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonalds . That
case inspired the Stella Awards for the most frivolous SUCCESSFUL
lawsuits in the United States.
Unfortunately the most recent lawsuit implicating McDonalds, the
teens who allege that eating at McDonalds has made them fat, was
filed after the 2002 award voting was closed. This suit will top
the 2003 awards list without question.
5th place (Tied).
Kathleen Robertson of Austin Texas was awarded $780,000 by a jury
of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who
was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were
understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the
misbehaving toddler was Ms Robertson's Son.
5th place (Tied).
19 year old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical
expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord.
Mr. Truman apparently did not notice there was someone at the wheel
of the car when he was trying to steal the hubcaps.
5th place (Tied).
Terrence Dickson of Bristol Pennsylvania was leaving a house he
had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to
get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was
malfunctioning. He could not reenter the house because the door
connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The
family were on vacation and Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the
garage for 8 days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found and a
large bag of dry dog food. He sued the houseowner's insurance
claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The Jury
agreed to the tune of $500,000
4th place.
Jerry Williams of Little Rock Arkansas was awarded $14,500 and
medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next
door neighbor's Beagle dog. The Beagle was on a chain in its
owner's fenced yard. The award was less than sought because the
jury felt the dog might have been a little provoked at the time as
Mr. Williams who had climbed over the fence into the yard was
shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.
3rd place.
A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of
Lancaster Pennsylvania $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink
and broke her coccyx (tailbone) The beverage was on the floor
because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds
earlier during an argument.
2nd place.
Kara Walton of Claymont Delaware sued the owner of a Night Club
in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the
floor and knocked out two of her front teeth. This occurred whilst
Ms. Walton was trying to sneak out of the window in the Ladies Room
to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and
dental expenses.
1st Place.
This year's runaway winner was Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma
City Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new Winnebago Motor
Home. On his trip home from an OU football game, having driven onto
the Freeway, he set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left
the drivers seat to go into the back and make himself a cup of
coffee. Not surprisingly the RV left the Freeway, crashed and
overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising him that
in the owner's manual that he could not actually do this. The jury
awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new Winnebago Motor Home. The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit just in
case there were any other complete morons buying their recreation
vehicles.
In a country where we strive everyday to prove Darwin was wrong,
and that yes a complete idiot can make a go of it, in fact prosper.
-luc
Subject: This is too funny......and it's true!
It's once again time to review the winners of the annual Stella
Awards. The Stella's are named after 81 year old Stella Liebeck who
spilled coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonalds . That
case inspired the Stella Awards for the most frivolous SUCCESSFUL
lawsuits in the United States.
Unfortunately the most recent lawsuit implicating McDonalds, the
teens who allege that eating at McDonalds has made them fat, was
filed after the 2002 award voting was closed. This suit will top
the 2003 awards list without question.
5th place (Tied).
Kathleen Robertson of Austin Texas was awarded $780,000 by a jury
of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who
was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were
understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the
misbehaving toddler was Ms Robertson's Son.
5th place (Tied).
19 year old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical
expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord.
Mr. Truman apparently did not notice there was someone at the wheel
of the car when he was trying to steal the hubcaps.
5th place (Tied).
Terrence Dickson of Bristol Pennsylvania was leaving a house he
had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to
get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was
malfunctioning. He could not reenter the house because the door
connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The
family were on vacation and Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the
garage for 8 days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found and a
large bag of dry dog food. He sued the houseowner's insurance
claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The Jury
agreed to the tune of $500,000
4th place.
Jerry Williams of Little Rock Arkansas was awarded $14,500 and
medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next
door neighbor's Beagle dog. The Beagle was on a chain in its
owner's fenced yard. The award was less than sought because the
jury felt the dog might have been a little provoked at the time as
Mr. Williams who had climbed over the fence into the yard was
shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.
3rd place.
A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of
Lancaster Pennsylvania $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink
and broke her coccyx (tailbone) The beverage was on the floor
because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds
earlier during an argument.
2nd place.
Kara Walton of Claymont Delaware sued the owner of a Night Club
in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the
floor and knocked out two of her front teeth. This occurred whilst
Ms. Walton was trying to sneak out of the window in the Ladies Room
to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and
dental expenses.
1st Place.
This year's runaway winner was Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma
City Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new Winnebago Motor
Home. On his trip home from an OU football game, having driven onto
the Freeway, he set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left
the drivers seat to go into the back and make himself a cup of
coffee. Not surprisingly the RV left the Freeway, crashed and
overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising him that
in the owner's manual that he could not actually do this. The jury
awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new Winnebago Motor Home. The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit just in
case there were any other complete morons buying their recreation
vehicles.
Post edited by RyanC_Masimo on
Comments
-
Only in America :rolleyes:Political Correctness'.........defined
"A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a t-u-r-d by the clean end."
President of Club Polk -
Where do they get these retarded jurys?
-
Originally posted by GuitarheadCA
Where do they get these retarded jurys?
Randomly selected via Bose Product Registration Cards!! -
You mean those people can write? :eek:
-
And vote no less...Two Channel Main
Receiver - VSX-54TX
Mains - Csi40's
Sub - Spiked Velodyne Cht-8 On Spiked Landscaping Stones
"If you could put speakers in a needle, I'd never see him again..." - My Girlfriend
