Have you ever....

tonyb

.....wanted to run your wife over with a lawn mower ?

A few years ago, I ask the wife what she wants for her birthday. She replies a Kitchen Aid mixer, stand mixer. You know the kind, got her the one with a more powerful motor and bigger bowl. She used it on and off over the next year but always complained it took up too much space on the counter. She doesn't like a lot of things on the counter.

My nephew comes in from California with his girl, they're getting married, nice girl.....good kids. Wife says, you want that mixer, I don't use it much....it's yours if you can get it back to Cali. I look at her with that stink eye.....wtf, go ahead.

Fast forward.....Honey, your birthday is coming up, anything you got an eye on you want ? Ya know, your going to kill me, but I really want a Kitchen aid mixer she says.

.....I'm sharpening the blades on the lawn mower as we speak.

Legender

You know what they say about women and changing their minds... well, I don't... but maybe you do.

lightman1

Fickle, vexing creatures.
I used to walk around in a perpetual state of "What the hell just happened?"

pitdogg2

Get her a yo-yo....

lightman1

DSkip wrote: »

lightman1 wrote: »

Fickle, vexing creatures.
I used to walk around in a perpetual state of "What the hell just happened?"

Used to?

Fair enough... a lot less now.

WagnerRC

Thanks for the laugh Tony. That was a good one.

BlueMDPicker

Gotta' love 'em, Tony. You're in luck. About all online retailers have them deeply discounted at the moment. Just read that in some news feed or another.

mrbiron

T-dawg,
Are we talking about running her over with a push or ride-on lawnmower?
I've done both...
Don't use a bagger unless you want to buy a new bagger. H3ll of a mess!
Only plus side is a bagger will catch any valuables instead of depositing then around the yard. Unless you're like me and don't buy your wife anything of value.
Dealer choice i guess.
My Toro has a hard time with skulls.
My Deere doesn't like femurs.
Drop your mower deck on a bag of play play sand to clean the underside of the deck.


Nothing worse than trying to sneak up on a wife with a running lawnmower...

tonyb

mrbiron wrote: »

Nothing worse than trying to sneak up on a wife with a running lawnmower...

That's easy my good man, all I have to say is....

Look....there's Dwayne Johnson, aka the Rock.....believe me, she'll pay no attention to what I'm doing.

mrbiron

I resemble Dwayne Johnson in a lot of ways except the muscles, height, good looks, talent, and money.

My wife hit a grand slam when she wrangled me! I remind her daily.

erniejade

I have a townhouse and my yard is small and can cut it with a weed whacker so I guess I can't technically run her over with it?

ZLTFUL

Get her the smallest version they sell at Target. It has the same build quality but in a much more cupboard storage size.

The only reason my wife has the commercial version is she has started catering on the side but she still wants the small one for day to day use.

But then we have a walk in pantry and a secondary pantry in the basement where she can store stuff she doesn't use regularly.

maximillian

I got the commercial version as a hand-me-down from the parents and I gave it to the wife (not as a gift). I spent an hour cleaning every tiny crevice and it looks almost brand new. It performs like new too. It is grey/silver in color.

She doesn't really like it because it's not red. Barely uses the thing, but still complains that it's not red. I ain't spending $300 on a new red one.

cfrizz

Tony, I would simply remind her that you already got her one and she gave it away because it took up too much room, pick another gift! Or better yet give her a GC so she can buy her own blasted gift!

rooftop59

I have always found it a bit weird that married couples who share the same bank accounts go out of the way to buy each other elaborate gifts. My wife and I buy some gifts, but it's mostly just something I know she wants that either she isn't going to take the time to hunt down or she feels bad about purchasing. But at this point in our marriage, with something like a small kitchen appliance, the question is 1. do we need it or want it and will we use and, 2. can we afford it. If the answer to both questions is yes, we just buy the dang thing. No gift necessary.

Obviously people handle these things differently of course...

westmassguy

Buy her the smaller model Tony. Make her happy, you'll be happy, the house will be happy, the neighborhood will be happy, I'll be happy.....Then remind her, when you want to swap out some equipment.

pitdogg2

cfrizz wrote: »

Tony, I would simply remind her that you already got her one and she gave it away because it took up too much room, pick another gift! Or better yet give her a GC so she can buy her own blasted gift!

westmassguy wrote: »

Buy her the smaller model Tony. Make her happy, you'll be happy, the house will be happy, the neighborhood will be happy, I'll be happy.....Then remind her, when you want to swap out some equipment.

look at these two...Always the voices of reason.

mhardy6647

1) if she got hold of you and if she has a KitchenAid "mixmaster" -- well, there won't be any physical evidence remaining, you know?

2) Go for the gusto -- why not shop around (maybe eBAY or gov't surplus) and get her a floorstanding commercial mixer). Fresh bread sammages a la carte!

mhardy6647

We have friends from grad school days with an interesting gift-giving philosophy. "Larry" (the husband) won't give "Nancy" (the wife) anything that she actually asks for, for her birthday or Christmas. "Nancy", thus, has to resort to clever subterfuge, or take her chances. On the other hand, "Larry" sets a high bar for himself to catch subtle cues and do his best to surprise her.

PS those are their actual given names - - I just felt like putting them in "quotes"; sorta channeling "cnh"

tonyb

Funny, her renewed interest in the mixer came after we came back from Italy and suddenly she had the urge to cook a lot. Italy does that to people.

Incidentally, her favorite color is red also, and the small mixers won't cut it for a big family.

You guys remember my posts on "no parties" because we were going to Italy and wanted to save as much coin as possible ? Since we came back, we already hosted a party for the office girls, and now hosting a thanksgiving for part of the family.

Which leads into......we need a new micro and range. Now, I've been saying, we need a new micro and range because a week before we left for vacation the micro took a dump. It's about 15 years old, not unusual, but you don't go out and buy a new over the range micro not knowing what the range will be. You kinda want them to match, no ? She' says no, wants to wait until the stove goes. My argument is.....you know it will go on thanksgiving when we have a ton of people over, then what ? We have to pay for the whole crowd to go out ? That would cost just about as much as a stove too. Anyway, the girls from her office sided with me and tomorrow the new range comes in and the micro I already installed. Which don't get me started on that either as I can't see why they can't make these things more universal for installation purposes.

Downside is, now with a new range, she wants to cook for everyone so let the parties start.....again. LOL Either way, I'm on the receiving end of good eats, so I shouldn't complain. Parties are already being planned for SB, shower for my daughter who's getting married, my Canadian friends who come to visit, Mom's birthday....and what the heck, might as well have one for daylight savings time too. Darn calendar is full of days, er...excuses to drink and cook.

stevep

When I last looked, which was longer than I remember, the smaller version had plastic gears, where the larger had a metal set with corresponding longevity.

tonyb

stevep wrote: »

When I last looked, which was longer than I remember, the smaller version had plastic gears, where the larger had a metal set with corresponding longevity.

True dat, in other words.....you get what you pay for.

tonyb

nbrowser wrote: »

Tony, simple...tell her to go get stuffed!

Obviously you don't know how this marriage thing works. lol

rooftop59

While I TOTALLY understand your frustration, I would encourage you to enjoy this time (which I KNOW you do) when you can throw these parties and eat and drink and have a good time. My wife and I love to cook and entertain - she taught me to cook before kids and now I do it all - we now have 4 kids 8 and under and both work full time, so the entertaining is few and far between and when we do it its a huge chore and other aspects of life suffer. So I am changing my previous answer. If your wife wants another mixer so you can entertain and cook together, by the dang mixer. Live it up brother!

And of course, happy wife...doesn't hurt!

tonyb

Yeah yeah yeah.....happy wife= happy life, what about happy husbands ? No cute sayings for happy husbands ? Because nobody cares that's why.

tonyb

I should rephrase things....it sounds like I'm complaining but I'm not. Just aggravating is all. We both love cooking and entertaining, but.....we aren't the type to just put out crackers and cheese and a cheap bottle of wine either. It can get costly, know what I'm sayin' ? Eats at the budget, and we don't do parties unless we can drink well and eat well.

Just reading what I just wrote, it has dawned on me I have this whole thing wrong. I should just serve cheese and crackers and cheap wine and nobody will want to come over for a party. Dang.....brilliant !!

Sometimes I amaze myself, other times.....I'm looking for my cell phone while I'm on it.

mhardy6647

tonyb wrote: »

Yeah yeah yeah.....happy wife= happy life..

Y'know what? Our house builder said that to me, more than once, during the process

what about happy husbands ? No cute sayings for happy husbands ? Because nobody cares that's why.

Preachin' to the choir, you are.

maximillian

westmassguy wrote: »

Buy her the smaller model Tony. Make her happy,

I don't know about that. I wouldn't trust her with any other Tony's regardless of the size.

tonyb

maximillian wrote: »

westmassguy wrote: »

Buy her the smaller model Tony. Make her happy,

I don't know about that. I wouldn't trust her with any other Tony's regardless of the size.

LOL......

Oh dear Cathy, being close to Boston you should know Italians do nothing....small. lol

Joey_V

No one cares about the husbands...

mrbigbluelight

"we need a new micro and range."

Well, having just spent ALL DAY yesterday with the install of a new over-the-range microwave and fume hood ..... geeeeeezzzzz .....
Oh, don't worry, we're still not done.
It isn't rocket science, but it's rather entertaining to undo/redo things that you discover the original builder did when they built the house.

And Tony, if you really want to keep the Mrs. happy, be sure to let her know that manufacturers are now putting out microwave/range combos that automatically sync with each other.
It's very important for the time displays to match on both units.
That is ... if you really love her !